Author: sean

Last night’s discussions were somewhat infuriating.

Though his prescriptive pretention annoys the living shit out of me sometimes, I do listen to Mike O’Meara normally a couple of days a week. One of concepts that comes up on his show more than a little is the concept of “douchebag thirties.”

For dudes, especially single dudes, it can get to be completely maddening.

I’m wondering if I avoided a lot of that with my health issues combined with the employment issues I’ve had helped me avoid a lot of it.

It’s hard to have any cocksure attitude when basically nothing on your body is working properly.

But I’d like to think that I wouldn’t have been quite that um….there’s a word, but I’m not sure what it is.

So. After spreading around the idea that the Non-Aggression Principle, and Libertarianism are the roots of all arguments, you try to argue from authority, and use a source that pretty much nobody’s ever heard of?

Maybe it’s easier when politics is your faith. You’ve embraced certain precepts, and those who dare question are heretics, well…..

I talked recently about people missing my hints on what I wanted for my birthday least year. So, I’ll leave it here, and see if anyone who’d be repeatedly asking me about what i want is paying the least bit of attention.

I want IT stuff. I need a new PC. This ancient AMD desktop is incredibly annoying. Plus it’s running Windows 8 because the Windows 10 install wasn’t allowed when I try. I gave up trying, and don’t want to mess with it too much because I’ve used a license for Microsoft Office on it, and don’t think I can reactivate it.

I also think I want a non-Amazon tablet.

I was also thinking about a NAS device so I can back things up, and stop paying Amazon for storage. Or anything. I’m purposefully trying not to give them my money. I have my own reasons for that. I could go on and on about that decision, but it’s not something that most people would care about. It’s my choice. Why I made my choice is my own business. Please don’t try to prevent me from making a decision different than what yours might have been.

Freedom is difficult to undrstand.

News.

Toronto strip club employee may have exposed 500 people to COVID-19

Well, the customers get paid to get exposed in a way…

Flashback —

8/15/2011 – 8/15/2011

It’s always amusing to listen to your higher-ups try to explain something to you that they, themselves, don’t understand.

This is something continues to be an issue. With the date on this, it wasn’t perhaps the most egregious misinformation I ever heard from management, but this obviously annoyed me.

Maybe that was less egregious considering it was someone trying to explain it to me, not someone else. You know, like a customer?

i had someone I worked for describe something I’d cobbled together as being “written in Java.” No, you Moran, the interface was written in PHP, and the hardware interface was written in C. Trying to do RS232 communications in Java was barely possible then. I don’t code anymore, but it’s probably still really questionable.

Whatever.

This was the same guy whose wife was getting corporate direction by consulting with a medium in Sedona. No. I didn’t make that up. Nor could have I. That place was that nuts.

Towards the end of my time there I was driving about 150 miles a day getting to and from the office. I was driving so much because the company had just walked away from the lease on the local office where I was working.

I’d taken to, in my last couple of months there, to cashing my paychecks at their bank, then driving back to Tidewater with a bunch of cash to deposit into my credit union account because I was worried about their check bouncing.

And I’m stopping now.

This was something from 8/13/2000. I don’t have my original responses, unfortunately, so I’m just going to go through it with responses from today.

New Survey Questions – 8/13/2000

This one’s gonna be rather personal, so beware….

Name: Sean
Occupation: Nerd
Time you’ve been on OD: Note that this is something from Open Diary. I started writing there in 1999, coming back from my self-imposed separation from doing this after the unfortunate incident as a high school student in 1994.
Current hours of continuous depression: Yeah, I have no idea what this was from. Not many.
Current hours of continuous boredom: Zero.
Alcohol
Last time you were drunk: It’s been awhile. I had a double G&T last night with a beer chaser. I don’t remember feeling much of anything.
Poison: I really don’t even know. Gin is probably most frequent.
Fave drink: Sazerac
Last time you were drunk on fave drink: Never? Those are tough to do more than one.
Last time drinking made you drive the porcelain buick: I don’t know. It’s been a very long time; more than a decade ago.
Last time drinking made you not make it to the porcelain buick: I don’t know that that’s ever happened.
Margaritas–frozen or on the rocks: On the rocks
Margaritas–salt oder nein: Salt
Beer–Best: I don’t have anything in particular, really. I will say that if there’s Great Lakes Edmund Fitzgerald available, I’ll probably drink it. Cleveland beer.
Beer–Worst: I don’t know. MGD, maybe? Rolling Rock? Michelob Ultra actually might be like sex in a canoe; fucking near water.
Have you consumed the following ghetto drinks:
MadDog 20/20: Yes.
Boone’s Farm: Yes.
Ripple: Yes.
Thunderbird: Yes.
Malt Liquor: Yes. And nobody got the hint last year that I might have wanted a 40-ounce Old English for my 40th birthday….
Moonshine: Yes
Wine Coolers: Yes
Zima: Yes
Tobacco
Do you smoke cigarettes: Not anymore.
Brand: N/A
Cigars: Not anymore.
Brand: N/A
Number of ashtrays in your house/flat/tenament/trailer/cardboard box/parkbench: Zero
Pipe: I’ve smoked one before, yes, but I’ve never owned one.
Fave pipe tobacco: No idea
Ever chewed snuff: Yes
Ever actually snuffed snuff: No
Ever chewed Long Cut: Yes
Ever chewed plug: No
Did you puke the first time you chewed: No. I was worried about that, naturally, with my fear of vomiting.

That whole section was pretty much unnecessary. I haven’t had any real tobacco in over ten years.

Firearms
Do you own any: No
What’s your fave in your collection: I don’t have any. Probably not a good idea for a guy too blind to drive.
Do you have a placard on your truck that reads “Driver carries at least $20 in ammo.”: I don’t have a truck
Number of shotguns in your gunrack in said truck: I don’t have a truck
Do you think a gun shop in the East End of Newport News is a good business opportunity: No.
Motoring
What hydrocarbon powered vehicles do you own: Zero. I’m too blind to drive.
From whom did you buy it: N/A
Is it a Ford: I owned one for something like eight years. I had fun in it for a while….when it wasn’t raining.
If so, is it green: No. It was red.
Brand of tires: I was a longtime BFG fan. But the Dunlop ATs I had on one of my Jeeps were great. On the Mustang, I was very skeptical about tires from Worst Korea, but the Kumhos I had on the Mustang were the best ones I ever had on it. Where you normally get petrol/gas: N/A. I haven’t driven since 2012.
Stick or automatic: I never owned a car with an automatic.
Sex
Have you had sex: I’m married.
What’s your magic number: For my wife and I to know. But, since I met my wife, it’s been one.
When was the last time you had sex: It’s happened in the past few weeks.
Was it good: No comment.
Has it ever been good: Yes.
What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done: Nunya
Make an inventory of your sex toys: Nunya
Number of times a day you masturbate: Somewhere around zero.
Does this number vary with the frequency of sex: Yes.
What does your mother know of your sex life: Very little. She does know that I’ve been married for almost a decade, and she’s probably not getting grandkids.
Food
Have you ever thought about food while having sex: I’m sure it’s happened, but I can’t recall a particular instance any time recently.
Have you ever used food for sex: Um?
What’s your favorite food: I really am not sure at this point.
Do you think there should be litigation against the fast food resturants like the tobacco companies: No.
Do you eat at French Restaurants: Yes.
What’s wrong with you: Many things.
What did you eat last: Ritz Crisps
Did you cook it: No
How bad is the heartburn: I’m on meds for that.

News after the flashback/entry.

Joe Biden wants to mandate masks. NPR, aka entertainment for rich white people, reports

No mention of penalty, jail, prison. But that’s the way they want it. Yes, I’ll wear a mask. No, I don’t think the state should throw you in prison for not wearing one. Joe disagrees. Who’s put more people in prison — Joe or his running mate? Is it easier to sniff hair through a mask?

Sofa King busy.

The cesspool that is Facebook is blocking this link, so I’ll be sure to share.

Obviously, that Biden’s handlers chose Kamala The Cop as the Vice President is the biggest story of the day.

Embedding a Tweet:

The mayor of DC paved over street art saying “Defund The Police” just as Kamala The Cop was being rolled out as the VP candidate.

Protest is okay so long as it’s state-approved in the manner they like. “Black LIves Matter Plaza” == good. “Defund The Police” == can’t have that.

8/12/05 – 8/12/2005

Still alive.

Been just working hard, with nothing much to say. It’s weird, however; I’m kicking ass at work these days, which brings praise. But I hate being doted over — really hate being recognized for anything publicly. I know some people thrive on that, but….

You want to get through to me about appreciation? It ain’t hard.

Pay me.

I suppose I should talk a bit about what I’m doing after my “promotion.” Essentially, I’m now the IT director for my company. I administer all of the computers in the office (now probably approaching 80), including the mission-critical air machines. Up until two weeks ago, this job had been divided among three people. Now it’s just me. (I’ve also still got some air stuff; let’s just put it this way……if I couldn’t be on the air, I’d go and do the same thing for a lot more money)

Compounding the problem is that we’ve been moving approximately a third of the staff due to the construction after the flood. It’s been a hassle, and the whole adjusting-to-daytime thing is trying, also.

There seems to be some forward momentum in life again, although somehow this seems sort of dead-end unless I can get something going on the air side, too. If anything, I hope I can make enough money to get myself into a better financial situation before I have to go look for another job (or go back to school).

Other shit….

Got new glasses today. They make me feel like I’m about fifteen feet tall. I’m not sure if this is going to work out. Took A. along when I went and picked out frames since she was a) so critical of my old ones, and b) thinks I needed some to make me look better so I can get married like everyone else…. >:-{ Ain’t like that’s going to happen anytime soon, anyway. But…..never know. I’ve been trying to get out more, be social, etc. etc.

That was an interesting tidbit, and there was no way to know that it’d be over in, what, three months?

The glasses bit was interesting, too. That would have been the last time I had an exam where the optometrist/ophthalmologist was able to correct me to 20/20 in both eyes.

The next year I’d have what was termed an “optic nerve contusion,” and really screwed up my vision for several weeks. (Probably and uncaught MS exacerbation)

In 2008, the optometrist couldn’t get me to 20/20 in the left eye, but I was pretty much okay.

In 2009, I barely passed the vision test for my license renewal.

By late 2012, I’d quit trying to drive at all.

Hmm….

Very long day at work, but I’m doing this because I committed to doing it.

Even though I know I shouldn’t.

But I’m thinking it might make me feel a bit better.

Mmmmmyeah.

That’s what I’ll keep telling myself.

I went to look for news, then I remembered seeing this on Twitter:

Let’s make sure we don’t offend the blessed police union.

And Kamala is the VP selection is in.

To paraphrase Michael Malice — who’s put more black people in prison, Joe Biden or Kamala Harris?

So, which couple is more interesting to share a bottle of wine with — Don and Mike, or Joe and Kamala?

I kinda doubt Don and Mike drink, but I think they’d be less likely to lock people up for choosing to do it, so I don’t know…..

Flashback time, and I have no earthly idea what this was about.

Man, that sucked. – 8/11/2003

So, I made it through, and now everybody has disappeared again.

My life continues…

And as usual, I’m insomniac.

Well, the wedding itself……I’d never met any of her family other than one of her cousins who was a bridesmaid (and has ahem grown up since she was in high school), and her mother. As expected, there were many, many more of her family there than of mine. Things went off basically without a hitch. No cold feet or anything. But the entire time was torture for me, except when I ran out to get shaving cream to fix my brother’s car.

But even worse than the wedding was the constant probing about what’s up with my love life. The answer is “nothing” followed by “and I can deal with that okay.”

I was wondering what that was about, but, reading it more closely, it was about a wedding.

Um. Yeah. I’m not going to elaborate a lot more; the marriage didn’t last.

But shaving cream does do interesting things to a Ford’s paint job.

Pretty good session with my doctor this morning.

I think I got across much of what I wanted to say.

News. Things are really breaking today, and I’ll bet that few in the corporate media are going to cover it.

To paraphrase Joe Biden, This is a big f’n deal.

Essentially, the FBI fed bad information to the Senate after Comey was fired.

Will the most-trustworthy man in media, Chuck Todd, report on it?

I won’t hold my breath

At least I know there won’t be a horse’s head in my bed in the morning.

Nada – 8/10/2002

Went to Circuit City…..bad me. Ended up buying The Godfather box set, and a Liz Phair CD.

Movement at work……the gears are turning, and the higher-ups are starting to realize that they’ve been majorly had. I’ve hinted at it before, but I’m not tactful enough to get the point across.

Lonely. bleh.

Off to work….

I bit the bullet, and chose to pay for HBO again so we could watch it on something other than our phone. It was the same price between ComcastXfinity, so Hulu got the nod.

As I pay again because logging in with my cell provider’s info doesn’t work.

But maybe my wife and I will finish The Sopranos, and eat some Italian food. I’m losing weight again after cutting some things out of my diet.

I’m okay with this.

But I’m skeptical about whether my clothes will start fitting better.

Saw what I had for my draft, and said, “nein.”

While there was something somewhat appropriate about my views on police, dating way back to before 9/11, I don’t feel like sharing it. It was my reaction to seeing a longtime, now ex, girlfriend who was driving around with hair of a very strange color, and had a “Bad Cop. No Donut.” bumper sticker.

So free-write, basically.

Update on the news from the past couple of days. The fucker who strangled the woman who accused him of rape managed to succeed in killing himself.

Bridget Phetasy sometimes talks about messing with people in Nextdoor. Nextdoor is, completely unintentionally, a collection of the worst ideas of many homeowners’ associations wrapped up in a single place.

It remains that way.

You combine age, and the religious certainty of adherence to one of the two parties, and you get a downright awful place.

Whether or not this worm should have been released from jail is less important than the fact that the Commonwealth had a responsibility to protect the victim while the criminal justice process proceeded. It didn’t do that. It doesn’t fucking matter if it happened in a place that’s a single-party colossus, the state, and its agents, didn’t do their job, and a crime victim is dead because of that.

Background right now is this, something I’d missed when I thought they’d gone behind the censorial company’s paywall. Good stuff.

More than a little distracted on this session tonight. I ended up working longer than I normally do, then spent a significant amount of time on the phone with a friend.

So news. Big surprise — Mike Pence thinks Justice Roberts hasn’t been good.

Why? Because he’s not a down-the-line Republican vote on the Court like most of the Democrats have been…because he’s not Alito?

Yeah. I don’t agree with that.

For what it’s worth, even some of the Democrats don’t necessarily vote as a block. Breyer is about the most-partisan. Kagan and Sotomayor have both had things that are a bit off the reservation. Her highness, The Notorious RBG, is completely out-to-lunch on some things, but there’s times when she actually does write things that make sense.

What Roberts did with the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, however, is something that to most straight-line Republicans is unforgivable.

I disagree.

If you read the decision, he absolutely eviscerates the left’s longtime argument that Congress can do basically whatever it wants in the name of regulating (Interstate) commerece.

No. Congress has the power to tax, and not much more than that.

I agreed with Justice Kennedy’s take that the penalty was a prohibited capitation, but that’s not what the majority decision said.

Whatever.

This latest bit was regarding what Roberts did with regards to Louisiana’s restrictions on abortion.

I am opposed to abortion. I am also opposed to capital punishment. (It’s almost as if I’m a part of the Papist conspiracy or something…..)

I recognize that amending the Constitution is really the only way to get rid of either.

Consequently, I can’t get too wound up when rulings come down against whatever menial meddling has taken place to end either one.

Amend the Constitution. That’s what the amendment process is for. If you can get 2/3rds of both houses, and 3/4ths of the states to agree, it’s done.

Then you’re not despairing about what happens in a plurality of another branch of government.

(Bubuhbut we should have fiat rule of the plurality! National popular vote now! End the filibuster in the Senate! Yeah, I know I suck at arguing for things I don’ subscribe to…)

Flashback to a long, long time ago. If it was a person, it’d be able to buy beer and cigarettes now.

(But would have been able to be drafted years ago, or go to prison for life long before that…..)

Self Abuse – 8/6/1999

No, I’m not talking about carving N’Sync logos into my arm with a razor blade……

But this is an issue I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. Some of these coping methods which seem so normal, can be termed as self abuse.

Let’s list some of them:

Overeating
not eating
sleeping all the time
not sleeping at all
chainsmoking
getting drunk off your ass
coffee

but there are so many…..I tend not to sleep, and live off coffee.

These normally are described as coping methods.

It has been said that happier people live longer…..maybe it’s partially due to the lower frequency of self abuse due to sadness.

Well, I’m off to refill my coffee cup…..later.

None of those was an appropriate reaction, but I didn’t know of any other way back then. I was sort of healthy, so it wasn’t as big an issue.

I should ask my PsyD next week about how I drop off on those sorts of things when I’m down. And, there, I almost beat myself up by saying that I can’t even manage to do that sort of thing correctly.