Another fun day at work. I really hate digging up my past work to show people what the fuck they’re supposed to be doing, but sometimes I have to.
There’s no other way.
I also don’t like studying for the letters I’m going to buy after my name while I’m at work. If I’m expected to do that there, why can’t I work from home? Why does my ass need to be in a cubicle?
My wife is off at work, which means I’m left to my own devices for a few hours.
I will probably spend a good portion of it napping. It’s one of the few things I do well these days.
Write a letter to your 13 year old {sic} self.
Dear Me,
You’re a jerk. You really aren’t as smart as you’ve been told throughout your childhood. Are you stupid? No. Are you above-average? Yes, but within two standard deviations. (You’ll understand why that’s relevant after you finally take statistics in college.)
You will have an opportunity to do what you dreamed of. It’ll be short-lived. Enjoy it while it lasts. You won’t be as good at it as you think you’ll be, but you won’t totally suck, either.
You will marry. It will happen later than you think right now. She will be someone you’d have never considered while dating around. She will be closer to you than anyone has ever been, including your parents. Don’t worry about the fact that she’s in First Grade right now; she’ll grow up.
Your body is failing you. In fact, those nights of burning feet you’ve already hed? Yeah, those aren’t athlete’s foot. It will get worse. Much worse. There’s really nothing you can do about it. It’s not because of something you’ve done, or will do, most likely. I’m not going to tell you what it is, but you will find out when you’re in your thirties, and it will have a major effect on your life.
Your relatives will start dying off real soon now. Some of them you’ll be prepared for. Some, it will be much too soon. Unfortunately, death is a certainty. Sure, you know that there’s a chance you could die in an accident, but that’s not the way that most people end up going.
Baseball will be completely screwed up next year. It will never get better for the Royals. Stick with the Saints, though. Your loyalty, there, will eventually be rewarded.