^H

Sometime during the really bad years of censorship, I was getting really tired of hearing podcasters who almost uniformly used the really bad NPR “Delicious Dish“-style almost-whispered delivery.

Who can I listen to who actually projects?

I remembered Bill Cunningham. Willie hosts his daily radio show on WLW in Cincinnati. He also hosts what became of the Matt Drudge Sunday night national show.

Cunningham often prefaces really-bad TV talk show clips by saying something along the lines of “I watched The View so you don’t have to.”

I forced myself to listen to JDVP, tying it back to Cincinnati, on Rogan. At least one of the recent WTF episodes had several tidbits about it.

I’d listened to him in the run-up to the election. The interview with Vance then was kinda interesting. Yeah, there were a few really off-the-wall things, but it’s the kind of thing that’s really to be expected of someone who would have been a mid-2000s Midwest Democrat. Vance came too late to collaborate with Harry Reid, but the sorts of batshit-crazy utterances are absolutely in line.

His analysis of the various Epstein conspiracy threads is….I’m failing to find the right word.

So, what was Vance’s take? The the really interesting stuff was from the 2008 trial, and that’s been deleted, but the Trump administration did a bad job rolling things out this term.

C’mon, guy. You were in the crowd who were floating the outrageous conspiracies during the Biden Administration.

You also didn’t do much, either then or now, to tamp down the weird, often antisemitic, claims. You know he was hiding money for Mossad, right? No, and you don’t know that, either.

So the nutbag Rogan audience is disappointed?

I don’t care.

Your focus on this issue is one of the myriad reasons why I’ll never vote for you. The 400-some members of the House who also cemented that distinction by voting to release a bunch of investigative data. Bubuhbut GOVERNMENT SECRECY!!1!

Yeah, there’s things that come through that need to be forgotten.

My tagline here is “everything gets deleted, eventually.” Maybe some day, it’ll be more difficult to remove the most-random thoughts from storage, but even that doesn’t make them things that should be shared publicly.

Can you even imagine?

Spoken: “She looks very nice today.”

Unspoken: “I wonder what she looks like without the dress, and these are the things I’d like to do with her.”

Keep those things to yourself. Nobody needs to know. Just like nobody needs to know about whatever crackhead fever dream someone told police about Epstein.

Would I turn down a chance to have Skyline Chili with JD? Absolutely not. Would I enjoy watching a Bengals’ game with him? Form a luxury box, sure. Outside during “The Freezer Bowl?” No way. Would I go fishing with him? Yeah, probably.

Absent the stupid things done after 9/11 (And I’m looking at you, TSA), I probably would have had a similar reaction to Harry Reid.

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Summer writing compulsion starts tomorrow. That it lines up with my participation in the clinical trial is pure coincidence.

In many places. Certainly here inside the Beltway Swamp.

But it’s cool here inside our apartment. I am almost certain that it’ll remain that way until all the festivities are finished. (This might be an instance where using “done” might be appropriate considering the weather.)

So, what am I doing otherwise?

• Summer writing. Again. I know I shouldn’t, but it’s something to do, and last week’s test kind of found the words flowing out. I do wonder if I can string together something more substantial, still.
• Financial planning. Questions to my lawyer about what I am able to do or not do while I’m getting insurance income. Can I get reimbursement for stuff like the research study? Would converting my conventional tax-deferred retirement holdings to Roth IRAs be possible, still? If I earn income through passive sources (e.g. dividend income), does that affect my insurance payments?
• Still trying to get through Euphoria. Um. Well, I only have a couple of episodes left’. might as well finish.

It’s not often I actually start writing a review with the title, but that’s how it’s coming out.

Manufacturing Delusion by Buck Sexton. The title of the book, itself, is a take-off of Chomsky and Herman’s Manufacturing Consent, a somewhat-seminal leftist tome that tied the origin of pretty much everything bad in the world to Capitalism, and US Industry.

After I finished the book, I said I should give it a few days to let my thoughts coalesce. They have, and although I respect Buck quite a bit, my initially-positive response has soured.

Time to get into the meat-and-potatoes.

• Recap of his bonafides is pretty good, and I understand how he reached some of the conclusions he posits. I admit holding reflective-antipathy towards CIA assets. I don’t know that that instinct has ever mislead me. Moderate Governor Langley in Virginia shows that brilliantly with her performance. (Missive about the Blue-Again-As-Harry-Byrd-Intended General Assembly’s performance excised for brevity; ask me offline). His bits about things like the Japanese Sarin attack in the 90s is something I certainly remember, but didn’t really pay close attention to. It’s similar to the 1994 AMIA Bombing, where the attorney who was working on the case in 2015 suspiciously “died by suicide” (I really hate that modern rewording….). But the bigger takeaway from his list drove another point home — in many, many, many ways, the 1990s sucked. I spent last week in Biloxi, Mississippi. Yes, quite a few things were rebuilt following Katrina, but I do remember Biloxi in the 1990s, spending a continuous month there so I was there long enough to sit for my Drivers’ Exam. Back then, pretty much every strip mall throughout d’Iberville had a pawn shop catering to people who’d lost their shirts at the newly-parked casinos. Hmm…. Maybe I’ll pick up an acoustic guitar while I’m down so I can plunk around on my train ride home. Nope. They’re all gone. No pickin’ in the Amtrak roomette. I did pick up something cheap on Space Cowboy Jeff’s Prime Days sale. It should be here later this week. But the roads in and around Biloxi were awful back then. Any wind would bring down branches. Over near where my mom’s house is, I can remember how badly twice-daily tides would cover some of the corners. But all of that is fixed now. Everything works. There’s Intertubes actually faster than I have at home inside the Beltway. Despite several storms, the power stayed on. The oppressive heat of a Mississippi summer was well-contained by air conditioning inside wherever I was. (My cousin’s kid’s car excepted, I stayed cool..). As I was going through Buck’s book, however, I started going through memories of the 1990s. I mentioned the Sarin attack and AMIA already, but there were many others.
  • Mogadishu
  • Ruby Ridge.
  • Rwanda
  • Bosnia
  • Oklahoma City
  • Khobar Towers
  • 96 Atlanta Olympics
  • Sudan “Wag The Dog,”
  • USS Cole
  • And so many others…
    During all of that, nothing new really was built, the Federal Debt continued to grow, and…. The 90s weren’t so great.
• The Stalin discussions are interesting.  Does it say something that a Georgian could win full power in the Soviet system? (I’ve said previously that a lot of the Left’s problems with ACB are that she’s not an Ivy League product. Small private undergrad? Notre Dame Law? You know how I know she’s a racist….?)
• I expect Putin to really start in on rehabilitation of his mentor Yuri Andropov. (My own prediction listening to it, but I think you can find out a lot about Putin by looking at how Andropov behaved in Hungary and Czechoslovakia…)
• The distortion means that reality becomes what the state says it is.  (COVID was of natural origin.  Hunter Biden wasn’t corrupt.)
• Stalin still has 70% approval in Russia, which is disappointing. (But maybe unsurprising.)
• Putin is rehabilitating Stalin because nobody is around to remember. (I’m wondering how true this still is with Ukrainian drones hitting all over Russia over the past couple of days. In the US, the rehab efforts lately have been on Jimmy Carter, and against Reagan. Yes, Carter let people brew beer, and ended some of the stupid regulations that were in place. Volcker did a good job at the Federal Reserve. But you have to keep at the top of mind lowering the Georgia flag to protest prosecution of Lieutenant Calley, Operation Eagle Claw, and his later support of the terrorists who’d become the DSA.)
• I feel bad for him that he went to UMass Amherst. (I did search a bit, and my reflexive antipathy is traceable to The Shadow University, and what I was doing on campus around 2000. What’s happened on campuses nationwide is actually the sort of thing I was concerned about. I believe in values generally enshrined in constitutional protections. And, no, I don’t hold those views on account of my overwhelming privilege. I graduated from Mencville High School in Newport News, Virginia, and that was the third high school I attended. I worked through college, a small public university, though I probably could have foregone work if I’d been okay with the restrictions that came with that. I was on the air with CBS News on a phone coupler when the clocks rolled to 1/1/00 after helping prepare for the switchover.)
• The self-segregation exercise are appalling. (And I think the HR staff who sponsored those sorts of things should find other ways to earn a living. I never really know where to put myself in those exercises. I’m not nearly as white as Senator Warren. I actually am physically-disabled. My privilege was attending three separate high schools as my dad was on Active Duty in the Army.)
• Tying the land acknowledgements to Maoist roots is interesting.  Er.  Good. (Who the hell am I supposed to acknowledge? My heritage is so varied that it’s tough to pin down. And one of my ancestors, who was a Choctaw elder who’s buried in the Congressional Cemetery after dying in DC following being honored for his efforts against the English in the War of 1812.)
• Good recap of the George Floyd riots, and their effects on his section of NYC.
• Decent recap of DeBlasio. (I would offer that NYC had two competent mayors since Ed Koch, who was taken down by the people now running the DSA.)
• The weapon use of law is important, too. I KNOW whatever is wrong, but I’m doing what the law says. So I’m free of any culpability legally and morally. 
• The bits about outlawing Kosher food preparation is incredible. We’ll force them to eat the way the law prescribes, or they can STARVE. (Interesting parallels can be drawn to some of the Green New Deal alchemy….)
• Evil can be, and often is, pretty banal.
• Race and Ethnic restrictions on the legal field. *cough*DEI*cough*. (This kind of gets a reinforcing smack both with some of the SCOTUS rulings last few months, and the “moderate” members of the Party of the Klan losing NYC primaries to radicals.
• Volksgerichtshof courts from Nazi Germany were an interesting bit. I’m reminded of some of the pushes for justice not delivered by the conventional US courts. (I tend to prefer justice systems based on English Common Law, but I can appreciate those based on Napoleonic Code. Few of the “justice” pushes recently are based in either, and are really the whim of the deciders. Whether that’s campus administrators, CHOP/CHAZ, people who called for the executions of George Zimmerman, Kyle Rittenhouse, or Derek Chauvin. Or Donald Trump.)
• Interesting framing of his childhood in nasty NYC to Giuliani.
• Brief reflections on Muller probe, and Alvin Bragg, but little discussion of just how wrong the “walls are closing in” crowd were.
• I think there’s a ton more to delve into about Jack Smith. Smith’s convictions of “Tollbooth Bob” McDonnell were unanimously overturned by SCOTUS; 8-0 after Scalia died. And this is the guy somebody in the Garland DOJ hired to get Trump? Really? (How has Smith not been disbarred for what he did with the Mar-a-lago raids over the classified documents? Who, exactly, hired him in the first place?)
• Interesting section about the use of fear to compel compliance. If you don’t wash your groceries….. “Doing the right thing” satisfies: Extinction Fears, Climate apocalyptic worries, the way-more-deadly-than Ebola Virus.
• Paul Ehrlich. I suppose I understand the inclusion with his recent death, but I would argue that there’s nothing at all useful from his writings. I guess that he’s a great example of spreading fear to force compliance.
• I think he makes a correct association of Malthus and Ehrlich. (How many other charlatans have so perilously-humanity? These are horrible people, and it bothers me that some are trying to rehabilitate their images.)

Conclusion: it’s not a bad piece of work, but I don’t think most things are as cut-and-dried as he presents them. I’m trying to be less frustrated by things than I have been lately; this book didn’t do a lot to ease my mind. Whatever I think about the purveyors is really unimportant, but I’m not going to think of them fondly. You’re terrible people, and I only will associate with you if there’s absolutely no alternative.

The next thing I’m plowing through is Enemy Feminisms by Sophie Lewis. I’m almost finished, but, much like Buck’s book, there’s things that are overcome-by-events. Hers has a less-recent publication date, but I’ve already noticed a few places where the usual narratives have been severely-disrupted by events in the second Trump term. I’m not sure I’ll write a review of that, but I’d be willing to discuss with someone else who’s consumed it.

US lost to Turkey who were already going home last night. 3-2 on a goal with basically no time left. Pfft.

There was much noise outside my room around the end of the game, though I’m questioning whether they were big soccer fans. (Join the club.)

After speaking highly of the OCR yesterday, I had this in my list for today:

“Sahith Theegala is around a penny.”

Huh? I honestly have no idea what that was getting out. Penny for your thoughts? Spend a penny?

Of course, the penny finally met its death this. year, where it was costing more to make than it was worth. And this is a problem for government?

“Sam Stevens is three cents.”

Good for you, Sam?

Write down clear intentions for providing yourself with those needs.

Heh. Yeah, that one worked, and that train has already left the station. My last couple of jobs were about as close as I can imagine to being perfect. IT is a 24/7 operation. I really feel odd operating in a situation where there’s a “regular” schedule. This is worse when you[re doing anything with the Federal Government, where there’s really a long vacation really form the Wednesday before Thanksgiving until the Super Bowl in February.

There’s people getting things done during those downtimes for everybody else.

Yes, it leads to some impatience in other aspects of life. No, I don’t want to wait until the morning. I have to wait until Tuesday because the person responsible is already off on vacation?

Get sh*t done. Regardless of the location on the calendar.

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But TheFP had bit in TGIF the morning about the sort of fine people who are taking over in NYC, now. A Congressman who lost lost to one of the DSA candidates who won Tuesday. Rep. Goldman went into a coffee shop so his daughter needed to use the bathroom, bought something, and saw the store owner call him out on Instagram.

Listen, I would probably never vote for Goldman, but a coffee shop is a public accommodation. You can’t reject customers based on their religion.

Now, I understand that the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was passed by Zionist racist occupier-run government.

I kinda of think that this sort of thing is an outgrowth of the past fifteen-or-so years’ attitudes on what constitutes “justice.” Laws, especially those passed by the historical oproessors, don’t matter. In fact, they should be ignored.

Nope. Not going to do that, sorry. And I’m never going to support you if you back the politicians who are involved with it.

I can’t find it, but I resolved after Zorhan was elected, I said that I wouldn’t;’t visit NYC while he was mayor. I was kind of waffling on that a bit, but the Goldman story, and the DSA wins this week have returned me to the inclination. If I have to go to NYC, I’m not leaving Penn Station. And when I’m in NYP, under the protection provided by Amtrak security, I’ll not buy anything from local vendors; Starbucks for me.

Alright. I’ve got to go. This fun is finished tomorrow.

I think I’d been plunking around some this morning, but didn’t get around to posting. I’m wiped out. This is the sort of thing that happens when I go too hard.

But I’ve gotten some of the things I wanted to do done. It’s unspeakably hot here. The USA is moving on to the next round, but are currently tied with Turkey.

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What does my body need more of right now (e.g., sleep, movement, rest, hydration)?

Another US win? Maybe some rest will help my sore legs. Significant time on my feet with questionable footwear hasn’t been kind to me.

How can I carry it into what’s next?

Um, I’m confused by this one. Was this intended for E-O-Y reflections? Were discussions about the technological advancements at lunch today. People forget just how much things sucked not too terribly long ago.

Well, if it’s deleted, it goes away, right?

I have such long notes on Buck Sexton’s latest book. He’s uses AI as the sort of panic that politicians and activists use to impel compliance because people are scared.

Yes, and…

Then in another section he talks about some of the amazing technologies that are coming around because of technological progress. But that leads to Neuralink, which is really neat for disabled people (oh, hi!).

But that technology could be used to foment fear based on implanted panic.

You know, I think that my inability to experience dread really screws up so many media and political targets.

Bad things happen. There are bad people in the world. There really isn’t anything I can do to fix that, and there’s not a thing a government can do to fix that. Well, they can kill people, but….

The book also sparked some memories of bad things from the 90s that those seem to be forgotten; I seem to remember an album title — Underrugswept?

I could live pretty comfortably here in Biloxi today. I don’t know I could have said that even ten years ago.

But I don’t want to get too much into the book review; that’s for the trip home.

I guess I hadn’t put as many of the ones I’d scanned into WP as I thought. Need to find where I have them in my Notes scrap.

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What do I want my voice to stand for?

Who knows? There’s not that many people I’m going to convince. I’m really fucking weird. It’s kinda interesting to see close people learn this. We’ve been together for more than twenty years, hon.

How am I using it right now, and where do I want it to go?

Maybe my questions make people take a moment before doing and saying something else.

Again, with some of what was in Buck’s book, when you’re sure that you and your crowd are right about everything, anyone who doesn’t agree completely is “on the other side.” No, I’m on my own side. I think you’re wrong for reasons that are things you’ve probably never thought of.

And short one. Time to do a few things.

Very aware that revisiting stuff with which you’re not entirely-familiar yields mixed reactions.
I’ve written a lot about the revelation that re-listening to Exile In Guyville was.

Latest thing?

Totes-didn’t-used-to-do-evil video site has been giving me lots of Nirvana lately.
Hmm. I’ll go re-listen to Bleach, something I probably haven’t done since about 1996.

It’s kind of what I remember, and expected.

Was it good? Again, hmm. (And now Marin Mull is slipping through my scarred brain…)

It fits with the time. Not nearly as good as Nevermind, but that’s kind of to be expected.

It’s uncomfortably hot here. Get drinks delivered. Let’s look for liquor delivery. Okay. There is one. And they’ve got World Cup specials. Segram’s 7. Ooh! I’ll try to make a 7&7! The liquor was the easy part; nobody had 7-Up. Like nobody. I seem to remember there being something about that on Numlock not long ago, but I’m too out of it to find the story.

Oh well. Try it with club soda. Unimpressed.

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So, scanned prompts.

“What does it mean to be a work in progress?”

The subtitle of this shitty blog should probably provide some insight. Nothing is ever truly finished, and everything gets deleted.

How much you can learn from past errors is questionable, but few things ever remain exactly as they were.

Circling back to Nirvana, Smells Like Teen Spirit sounded completely different after mixing. What Kurt Cobain described as a peppy song turned darker.

And, yes, I was, and still am, entertained.

“How can I be gentler with myself in the process?”

I’m actually wondering if this scanned correctly. But it’s unimportant. Wherever I could have been my greatest self is in a fading rear-view. I’m broken. I’m almost certain that even if in the unlikely event that my various MS maladies are “cured,” I’m still on the downslope of life. There’s no memorable achievements ahead. So, fight entropy, and hope some people who care about me outlive me, and remember me fondly.

Wonder if the AI review would say that that’s raw, honest.

I’m working through Buck Sexton’s book. It was one of the ones on my to-read list while I was in massive money-saving mode. It’s probably will have enough there for a good OWT entry. Finally. Something I can do on the way back. I will say that I do not like the new roomette cars. It is a pain to put on shoes every time nature calls.

So, prompts…

What’s the most important lesson I’ve learned about myself this year?

I can just stop. And sometimes holding my tongue really isn’t the best thing.

How am I already shaping that story today?

As I said, working on that book review. Some of the things I was consuming podcast-wise just weren’t adding anything to my life, really. Yes, I’m still listening to lots of things, but rolling in books while writing about them, along with No Agenda seems to suffice.