Thirty-one

July is coming to an end; about damn time.

So, prompts….

1. Do you believe in soul mates? If so, do you believe we each have just one soul mate?

Yes, and yes.  I’ve found mine.  How that happened, I still don’t know. We’re a team.  I don’t know how much of this stuff I could have done without her.

2. What would you do if you could live a day without consequences?

I got a response to this one on where I’m keeping my personal stuff.  I agreed with the sentiments, then,  After a bit more selection, though, even fun excess has consequences for me these days.  One of the networks in promoting a new show where this woman is in what’s supposed to be heaven.  She’s amped that she can drink as much wine as she wants without a hangover the next day.  Yes, but there’d still be puking day-of.  Maybe you don’t feel like a sewer the day after, but you can still abuse yourself to the point where it’s not fun anymore.  What can I do for a day without discomfort of some kind?  That’s tough to answer with my condition;  consequences come a lot faster than they do for healthy folks.

I don’t know what more to say, really.  I really need my next infusion;  I’m really at the end of my rope today.  Pffft.  Friday, when I get my next infusion, can’t come soon enough.

And that brings me to my bit for tomorrow:  What can you not do today, that you really enjoyed when you were younger?

On a completely unrelated note, it’s storming like crazy right now.  This is after some rather large storms this morning.

Thirty

Your biggest regrets. Enumerate and describe them.


I’m using my wife’s giant purple laptop after the Windows 10 upgrade. My work system already has it, so I’m not completely unfamiliar, but there’s still an adjustment period. I do kind of like Microsoft’s visual accessibility tools. I was very hesitant at first, but this does work much better than bigger font on everything. I’m going to recycle from NoJoMo 2012, because it seems to fit. For my answers back then, here1. Do you believe in soul mates? If so, do you believe we each have just one soul mate? 2. What would you do if you could live a day without consequences?

Twenty-nine

How are you at remembering people?

This one was prompted by seeing minor dealings with folks I’m sure i once met. Thankfully, there are other professional counterparts who’ve not experienced the problems I have.

I don’t see very well anymore, which makes things even more difficult. So, I pay particular attention to written names, and voices.

But it’s certainly not my forte. Even when I was in broadcasting, I was terrible about remembering people. I’d remember callers’ voices, but not their faces when i met them in person.

I could probably write more about this if I reflected on it for awhile. Unfortunately, it was a very rough day for me,

So, what for tomorrow?

Your biggest regrets. Enumerate and describe them.

Twenty-eight

I promised yesterday to dig out some of my various bits about the Saints. I’m going to try to explain each as best I can remember.

Prompt for tomorrow early, since I probably won’t want to search to the end of this incredibly-long replay….

My dad was in the Army when I was growing up.  I moved a lot.  Nowadays, in my work life, I’m running across people I may have met at some point, but don’t remember.  I remember the names, but can’t remember much more.  How are you at remembering people?

I write. It’s something I have done, despite my high school English teacher’s attempt to dissuade me…. (There was an extra credit opportunity for one marking period. We had to write at least two entries per week. I was the only one in the class who wrote. Because of the poor participation, she read everything I’d written. I was fifteen. I was in a new place. I was lonely. Things were going on with my body that I couldn’t hope to understand. She was really worried. So was I when she said I ought to go speak to someone. I don’t know what could have been that bad, really…)

So, on to it….

From 1999….
GoSaintsGoSaints

Faith: An irrational belief….a belief for which one has absolutely no evidence.

My faith: The Saints will win the Super Bowl this year.


Much like those disappointed in the Great Disappointment, I was disappointed that year. I think That was Ditka’s first season as coach. He drafted Danny Wuerffel…

Mister Politics – 11/7/2000


I voted this morning. Man, what a turnout. And for the first time in my rather short time voting, I feel good about it. I don’t feel like I’ve done something wrong–that I’ve ignored my heart and my mind in the name of pragmatism. I voted Libertarian for Pres, VP, and house. Voted Republican for Senate. And I campaigned. I handed out flyers that I bought on campus. I know my Libertarian candidates aren’t going to win. But voting for a winner isn’t what’s important. Root for your team–they’ll remeber it. Hell, I’m a die-hard Saints fan. That should say tons about my dedication.

Still rabblerousing at school. It’s fun. I’ve just chastised the student senate for refusing to take a stand on which the faculty spoke nearly unanimously against the administration. These folks are really spineless.

I really hate mainstream politicians.

Well, it’s off to class, then to the Libertarian Freedom party to watch the election results. Yippee.


That one has some relevance to today. It was the last time I voted for a third-party candidate. I’d campaigned for him on campus, gotten sideways looks for not being a Republican. (Back then, being a Republican wasn’t a capital crime on campus, and the university president was a former Republican senator…..so, before Quentin Kidd ever sniffed CNU….)

The next one is when the Saints beat the defending Super Bowl champion St. Louis Rams…


SAINTS WIN!!!! – 12/30/2000


SAINTS WIN!!!

SAINTS WIN!!!

NO MORE AIN’TS!!!

SAINTS WIN!!!

So long, Rams. 🙂

After 33 years, it’s about damn time.

SAINTS WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


This next one was recapping my New Year’s Eve in 2000. I guess there were NFL games.


All the trouble in the world… – 1/2/2001


Including the fact that my e-mail account at alloymail is kaputt.

No kiss at midnight. Bleh. Went to (a coworker’s) party….was a pretty good time. I’ve been avoiding the hooch lately. Good thing, too. Other than that, nothing much is up. Waiting for the Saints game on Saturday. And of course, they’re playing the team I hate almost as much as the 49ers….the Vikings!


So, yeah, I was lonely then, too. I don’t know why I had such a distaste for the Vikings at that point in time. I could go back and look, but I really don’t care. RIP, Dennis Green; they are who we thought they were. Peyton Manning proved that.


Bummed Out – 10/13/2002


Feeling bleh lately, mainly due to being at work all the time. I know what I have to do tomorrow, but I’m now second-guessing myself.

Tough football game today. It’s always hard on me when the Saints and Skins play. This one was a bit easier than the 40-10 flogging last season.

Hit on the personals ad. She types in all caps, with rainbow colors. Has a kid. Go figure.

Not much else to say. I still can cook ribs better than anybody I know. My ribs kick ass, yo.


I’m also going to guess she was an Eagles’ fan.


He might look like Curley – 11/25/2002


But the old dude still fucking rocks. I wish I coulda stayed longer….

Drank too much, but was sober by the time I got back to the car.

Working. Tired.

Fucking Saints lost.


I’m sure that was about a Frank Black concert. I don’t remember where, etc.

The title of the next one was in reference to the now-defunct diary site, where my subscription was about to lapse.

I don’t have a problem paying something I like, and I did pay a lot for that site.


Yellow Box – 11/29/2002


To renew or not to renew, that is the question.

Of course, what else would I do at 2:07 in the morning? Still, few notes, few faves, I don’t spend nearly the amount of time I used to….

So…thanksgiving….

I ended up taking over the preparation of the turkey after my dad fell asleep. I think it turned out okay. He was doing it on the grill, but I couldn’t get it up to the right temperature. I ended up finishing it in the oven. Burned the fuck out of my finger trying to get the damn thing off the grill. Why he bought a twentysome pound turkey for four people, I dunno. The dogs will get most of it I’m sure.

Watched in disgust as the Redskins managed to grab defeat from the hands of victory once again. They look better, and I guess it helps the Saints’ playoff hopes, having them lose.

Am I the only one who gets nervous every time Danny Wuerffel goes back to pass?

I’m happy for the guy, though. Perhaps people will stop ridiculing him so much. It’s quite obvious that he’s not the most physically gifted quarterback to play the game. Far from it, in fact. But he tends to play within himself, and when he does, he’s pretty good. NFL scouts pay so much attention these days to the physical aspects of players…I wonder if that’s a bit overrated. Wuerffel was a proven winner in college, even without great tools. He can win in the NFL if he plays his game, and has good players around him. Look at the guys with guns who haven’t made it. Jim Drukenmiller….hell of an arm at Virginia Tech. Couldn’t make it in the freakin’ XFL, much less the NFL. Ryan Leaf. I don’t need to say anything more than his name.

(NOTE:Paragraph deleted about the people I spent the evening with. I only remember one of them, and don’t remember any of the context.)

It’s cold out. No snow, though. :-/

Busy night at work, but at the same time, kind of slack. I don’t know if there’s going to be a newsfeed at 3:35; I assume so, and that’ll give me something to do. But I’ve finished everything I can do to this point and am kind of bored.

And nobody’s online. I blame the triptophane.


I think this was about the Falcons’ fans wearing paper bags….


Biters – 12/16/2002


http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/gallery/20021215/1040016246cardinals_rams_str108.html

Just because your team plays in a dome, in the NFC West, and you suck, doesn’t mean you can wear bags on your heads. That’s reserved for Saints’ fans – the ones who started it all.

Fuckin’ Saints. :-/ Lost to the crappy-ass Vikings….

Fuckin’ Saints.


Sooo tired – 7/13/2003


I haven’t been sleeping well the past week or so (what’s new?). After being up most of the day yesterday, I got up early this morning to go to the auction up yonder. Didn’t get a whole lot, but I found a laser printer for (nickname deleted….I doubt the recipient remembers it…she and I are still on good terms). After all that was done, I came home and got like two hours of sleep, then went over to (someone else’s) new place, hoping to coax them out to drink.

(Note: And a bunch deleted…again, more stuff I really don’t remember all that well.)

I saw Lynda Carter on TV this afternoon. I still lust after Wonder Woman. Even if she is old enough to be my mother.

Saints’ quarterback Aaron Brooks has to be the worst interview ever. I guess he had a football camp here yesterday. I’m watching news re-runs. Yay.

I think I’m going to go pay more attention to my beer, lest it take after me and cease being cool.


And I didn’t say a lot for a long time. Things were pretty tough in New Orleans for several years.


Cold November Rain – 12/1/2009


So, yeah, I’ve slacked off again, but I have a good fucking excuse this time….

When the remnants of Hurricane Ida turned extra-tropical, and became a Nor’easter, well, Norfolk (and me, personally) got hit pretty hard. It’s been a wild few weeks, and my apartment still isn’t fixed. My dollar damage was just below my insurance deductible, but…..

Four days without power
A week without hot water
Two weeks without laundry in the building

I ended up doing work at the radio station in the middle of the storm. They lost several machines during the power weirdness, and I spent time getting them back running. They’re still using a spare computer of mine as their mail server. What else was I going to do? Not like I had anything to do at home.

Still don’t know when my bedrooms are going to be fixed. Plaster down. Mildew. Stained carpets….

In brighter news, we’re going to see the Saints play the Redskins this weekend. In DC. It might snow.

Can I catch a break sometime?

In the midst of all the chaos, I did, however, finish up the two year project from hell at work. Ironically, a disaster recovery project…..


So, yeah, there was that. I was already living here in Downtown Norfolk.

I’d also given up on trying to come up with interesting titles for my entries.


08/30/2010 – 8/30/2010


Amazon recommends for me books on the New Orleans Saints and refillable fountain pen cartridges.

Guess what I’ve bought recently…….


Day 12 – Take Me Anywhere – 11/12/2010


Now that that Tegan and Sara song is stuck in my head (and probably will be all day), let’s begin, shall we?

The desire to travel really never leaves, but it does change. It’s more now about what I’d like to show off, and what would satisfy coroporal pleasures…..that just sightseeing. My eyes aren’t good enough anymore. I doubt the Grand Coulee Dam would have the same effect on me today as it had in 2003.

So, it’s where can I go where I can taste, smell, hear, feel…….and that makes it difficult.

I’d like to take my wife to New Orleans. I need to get her back to eating Creole spices first, however…… She had a very unfortunate incident with some leftover jambalaya…..and a large amount of rum…..

I’d also like to go to NYC. This is a more recent desire. But it’d be so easy, it’s one of those things like…..why the hell haven’t I done this? Last time I looked, train tickets are like $80 bucks each way. Maybe it’d be nice to go around this time of year…..see the holiday decorations. We will not be going for NYE.

I mention that, as the TV news just had on a story about the Christmas tree being put into place.

We were in DC the first weekend of December last year. It was snowing. We wandered around, saw the Christmas tree, saw the light displays for each state on the Mall, then went and shivered in the stands at FedEx Field on Sunday. (And watched the Saints pull out a win they never should have…..thank you Mister Canadian Kicker).

But, back to the topic….I want to go places I can walk around the city. Hear things. Smell the odors of the city. And eat and drink without worrying. Fly or take the train in, get off, get on the subway, and just go. Never touch a damn car.

If only money and available leave allowed it…..

Speaking of which, I need to get ready for work. At leas I’m not working for the place doing substantial layoffs today. I hope the couple of folks I know who work there aren’t getting let go. It’s only going to get worse here. My slot is safe through next July; I don’t know if I’ll stay in it that long.


I should have been smarter after that entry; I should have paid closer attention to my own situation.


Day 21 – Five Years Ago – 11/21/2010


If you could go back in time to 5 years ago, and was able to tell your past self where your life is now; do you think your past self would believe that so much, or so little as the case may be, has changed?

I think my past self would have been in disbelief about a few things.

  1. I’m married?!?
  2. I’m not back working in radio, as I thought I would be.
  3. MS, obviously.
  4. I’m still here in the same area.
  5. How badly the then-new job would go.
  6. The Saints won a Super Bowl.

So, mixed bag. I don’t know that I’d necessarily change anything I had control over (as I’ve said, I’ve had MS symptoms since I was a pre-teen).

I’ve been trying not to go back and look too much lately; my focus needs to be on the here and now. Devoting my energy to the current moment is all I can really do. Obviously, I have to keep an eye on the future, so I don’t fuck something up, royally. But I can’t plan ten years down the road, and it’s a waste of energy for me to try. I don’t have any idea, really, what life is going to be like this time next year, much less far beyond that. I’m kind of focused on football this afternoon, and wondering when he hell my wife is going to decide to come home, after she’s left me alone all weekend. :-/ I even bought her some stuff she likes at the store, and she’s not here. 🙁


Yes, the last paragraph there shows that I wasn’t completely reckless. But, I think my biggest mistake was, maybe, taking others’ advice, and ignoring my inclinations. That motherfucker in prison recommended me to the four-letter company, and I accepted the job at 77% of my former salary. My initial reaction was to tell the manager to add ten percent to his offer, and we’d start negating. I got advice just to accept his cellar offer, and I took it. My mistake. Unfortunately, it’s now almost four years later, and I still haven’t gotten back to what I was making then. FORWARD


Day 25 – Giving Thanks – 11/25/2010


Write about 25 things you are thankful for today.
25. Dogs. I wish I had one who lived with me. The three who adore me at my parents’ and in-laws’ will have to suffice for the time being.
24. Perdue. No, not the chicken guys, the university in Indianastan. I see prospects for interesting future opportunities, and they’re doing all sorts of interesting, important research (including into MS), and they’re responsible for;
23. Breesus. And the New Orleans Saints. The win over the Vikings in the NFC Championship Game in January had to be one of the best moments in my life as a sports fan. I really wouldn’t have been disappointed if they’d lost the Super Bowl. This leads me to…
22. Amazingly funny things on Teh Intertubez, like Kissing Suzy Kolber, who delivered this gem written a week before the Super Bowl.
21. Music. I tweeted yesterday about the new promotion to follow Two-fer Tuesday….Earworm Wednesday. I really don’t give a shit if anyone likes the stuff I do anymore. I’m just glad that there’s people still making honest music, and, despite the shit you see on American Idol, etc., there is still good stuff out there if you look for it.
20. People who devote themselves to thankless, yet vitally important jobs. There’s all sorts of things people do that are under-appreciated. I’m thinking today about a friend I haven’t been able to get in touch with last few weeks. I’ve written about him here before. He used to work in the parking garage at the radio station, he ran off to Texas for a few years. I flew down there to Ron Paul land to pick him up, and help him get back here just before Christmas 2006. He’s a garbageman now. He works an incredibly difficult job. The guys that ride on the back of his truck? They’re jail inmates. He lived in a house without electricity, water, or gas for awhile, due to an unfortunate circumstance not of his doing. He makes so little money, it’s absolutely disgusting. But what he does for that armpit of a city where he lives and works…..words fail.
19. Beer. Here’s to you, Mister City Sanitation worker.
18. Modern medicine. It’s incredible how things have changed just in the past fifteen or so years for people with MS. I do live a halfway normal life, and have a bright future. There are clouds everywhere, popcorn thunderstorms, but it’s not the dark menace it would have been had I been diagnosed when I started having symptoms (early 90s).
17. Diet Pepsi.
16. My in-laws. They may have been skeptical of me at the beginning, but I think they know I love their daughter.
15. Shit that makes me laugh.
14. That maybe sanity is prevailing in politics. Maybe I’m wrong, but nothing would please me more than to see the Sarah Palins and Keith Olbermanns of the world achieve the obscurity they so richly deserve.
13. New appreciations. There’s all sorts of stuff I wouldn’t have touched before I got sick that I like now. I sense things differently. That’s pretty much all the senses, not just taste. I don’t know if I’ve learned to appreciate things better for what they are, or….
12. The people I work to support. I bitch about the people I work with directly, and it’s completely justified. But, ultimately, I remember the people who I work for, who spend months doing thankless, dirty jobs on ships, away from their families.
11. Memes and other obscure cultural references. As I just said to my wife, during a discussion of how she’s too short to be a Rockette…. “Snooki could never be a Rockette.
10. Ibuprofen. :-/
9. Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe fatten me up. Back below the danger threshold on the weight yesterday, despite pigging out at the Mongolian BBQ place Tuesday night.
8. My primary care doc. I hope she stays around here after she finishes her residency. She’d planned on being a trauma doc, but her mother convinced her to do primary medicine so she could have a life outside an emergency room….but she has a different view on illness and life than I’ve seen from most doctors. Maybe that comes from her time in the Army or as an FBI investigator, but… A doctor who describes modern MS as being like being a diabetic, except I don’t have to check my blood sugar, or watch what I eat…. And who says drinking beer is probably good for me. No, really.
7. Kermit the Frog. He’s floating down the street, and I played “Rainbow Connection” on the radio. Off a 45.
6. Pie. Mmmmmm. Pie.
5. Rest and relaxation. I’ve learned better.
4. Professional colleagues who encourage me through my trials and tribulations. Unfortunately, not many of them work for my company, or in my organization.
3. The friends who truly care about me. I’ve learned a lot in the past year about who really gives a shit about me.
2. My parents. I appreciate much better what they accomplished, how much they care about me, etc., and this is the part of the entry where the tears are coming on..
1. My wife. I could write for hours, but my domestic readers will be getting plenty of sugar today anyway. Do I need to add more sweetness, writing about the sweetness she adds to my life?


I think I probably posted that here.



01/08/2011
 – 1/8/2011


So, I haven’t written much last few days. Lots of reasons, but mainly it’s because I haven’t been near a computer with enough free time…….

Work is still spiraling down the toilet.

We had dinner with my mom on Wednesday night. An Italian joint where we’d been with my parents opened a second store a few blocks away. Very good. Bit more than I wanted to spend, but I think my mom enjoyed the evening out. I helped her get the mega Christmas tree out to the curb, and made plans to come back up Saturday to help her with a few other things…..

Thursday, we went to see my primary care doctor. She went over the MRI results with me in a lot more detail than the neurologist’s nurse had over the phone. Turns out there was more inactive stuff that showed up that they didn’t tell me about. Three more small lesions in a different part of the brain. The MRI report said that, in retrospect, they may have been present on in April. Regardless, their location probably wasn’t causing any of the symptoms that led to diagnosis….

As I’ve said often, I’ve had suspicious things dating back a long, long time.

No physical therapy. Prescription for a couple of things….symptom treatment. No fun stuff, unfortunately. My weight on her scale was two pounds above that floor she’d set last time I saw her. On my scale that morning, I’d been three pounds under. So, what did the clothes weigh?

Since then, I’ve dropped three more.

Friday, I went to the dentist; I wasn’t sure if he’d heard about my dad dying. Thankfully, he had, so it wasn’t a big shock to the entire staff first thing in the morning. I guess my dad had been his patient for something like fifteen years…..

Wife is at her mother’s. Amazingly, something came up and she decided she needed to spend the night over there……. If I was more of an asshole, I’d start to get pissed off about that.

I fixed a few of the things for my mom earlier this afternoon. She’s got heat upstairs now, which is good. Even an eighty pound dog sharing the bed doesn’t help in such cold weather. A future in the exciting world of HVAC repair awaits me!

It’s snowed a bit this afternoon. Forecasters hedging bets about the next week.

Fucking Saints. But I don’t care who you are. If you give up 40 points to a 7-9 team, you deserve to lose.

yawn So football’s done. Nobody else left I’d really root for. Right now, I’m just rooting against people……


4/20/2011 – 4/20/2011


Oh well. So much for answering questions, as I didn’t get any.

Bottom line on the past year? It’s been hell for the most part.

High points:

  • Marrying my wife
  • Successfully dealing with this disease.
  • Amazing culinary adventures
  • My two short trips
  • NoJoMo, and getting through it

Low points:

  • My dad dying
  • Work
  • Pain. Lots of pain
  • Hitting veins with injections
  • Hitting muscle with injections
  • Saints. Goddamnitsomuch

Oh well. A new year starts for me on this Green Day, in which I shall not be partoking. o.O


I didn’t know how good I had it.


10/18/2011 – 10/18/2011


Apologies for not continuing on yesterday, but work took a hell of a lot out of me.

Uh, where was I?

We got to DC without any problems, really. I didn’t enjoy the drive, and my wife had to help me find the rental car return. (I couldn’t read the signs at the airport, even at fifteen miles an hour…..)

Got on the Metro, went to Union Station, checked our bags at the luggage counter for a few hours, and went to her favorite place for lunch. Gorgeous weather, albeit a bit hot walking around Dupont Circle after we went up the wrong escalator getting off…..

Good food, then back to the train station to get on the train.

It was on time. Almost exactly. Within five minutes. There’s lots of things about Amtrak that suck, but their on-time performance has improved considerably, especially in the Northeast Corridor.

Problems? Yeah, no idea which sleeper compartment was ours. The guy who checked our tickets (and helped with our overstuffed suitcases) handed us off to Marcie. Marcie seriously made the trip for us. She’s a New Orleans native, former Saints’ season ticket holder, genuinely excited we chose to spend our vacation in her hometown….

She’s maybe mid-50s. Widowed not long after she was married. Car accident. 🙁

“Two-T’s. Talk and touch. Keeps ya together.”

She coordinated our slots in the dining car, brought us drinks from the lounge car, made our bed, and stopped by to talk at appropriate intervals. Incredibly sweet Southern lady. We wrote her a thank-you note, and tipped her when we got off. My wife hugged her.

(and now I’m tearing up…..)

The trip down went incredibly quickly. The train did stop in the town where my mom was born, so my wife got to see a bit of that….. No sexytime on the train, either way…

Got to New Orleans only about ten minutes after our scheduled arrival time. Got in the cab queue, and….
The first cabbie in NOLA showed many of the things wrong with the city….he was trying to get his paperwork straight for his BP settlement. Months of slow business last year because of it, but it’s picked back up. But not to the tune of what he’s trying to get from BP – $120,000.

Sorry, but I have trouble believing a cabbie makes that much in a single year, much less nine months.

For all that Katrina fucked up, displacement of a lot of folks like that guy might not be a bad thing. My friend, PGB, helped evacuate people from the city outside Houston where he was living for Hurricane Rita, a few months after Katrina. One NOLA displacee, displaced again by Rita, was being shown the apartment the State of Texas had set up for her just outside Austin. She was having none of it. “I SURVIVED HURRICANE KATRINA. I AIN’T LIVIN’ IN NO APARTMENT. I SURVIVED HURRICANE KATRINA – SOMEBODY OWES ME A HOUSE.”

Serious.

But, yes, we got to the hotel, manuvering around “construction.” Cab fare? Almost $20 for what was probably about a mile and a half trip….

We got some suggestions about places that might be open late for food, relaxed in our room for a bit, then went to dinner.



10/30/2011
 – 10/30/2011


Aw, not this shit again….

My godfather is in ICU…had either a heart attack or stroke in his sleep. No pulse when the ambulance arrived at the house.

Hmph.

He helped me out a lot, and is partially responsible for where I am professionally.

Haven’t heard anything, but the last news wasn’t good. He’d gone into cardiac arrest twice in ICU, but I haven’t heard if he’s passed. He’s under 60 years old. I was the ring-bearer in his wedding. Only vague memories. My very pregnant mother was the Matron of Honor.

Shit.

Looks like I may be making an unplanned trip to Tennessee this week.

sigh

And the Saints lost.

We’ll see. They’ve stabilized him in ICU. They don’t thin he had a heart attack or stroke. But no pupillary response, so it doesn’t look good. Kind of coordinating with my Mom about travel plans if he does pass. sigh

And the Redskins got shutout.

Today completely sucks.

Twenty-seven

Are you ready for some football? Any predictions for the upcoming NFL season?

Once again, I’m going back to what’s proven to work. What’s that? On offense, the I formation. On defense, the 43.

Whichever teams that run that will be successful. In the AFC? I think it could be Cincinnati or Oakland. In the NFC? Much as I hate to say it, i think those teams are Los Angeles, and Dallas.

The NFC teams, of course, will need to stay healthy. That was a problem for Dallas last year. The Rams’ line is questionable, too, but I don’t expect a ton of pressure from the other defenses in their division.

I am ready for fantasy. Hmmmm….

What else? I don’t even know. I made it in to the office, which is an accomplishment in and of itself. My shoulder is barking at me because of it.

Maybe this Legends Brown Ale will take the edge off.

Prompt for tomorrow. How about some recycling of my old writing about the Saints. Yes, I’ve been a Saints’ fan since Jim Mora was running his USFL all-star teams. It’s not been easy.

Twenty-six

Write about recent dreams.  Do you dream often?  Anything odd lately stick out in your mind?

Lots of dreams about my wife lately.  I don’t normally dream about people. I’m not really sure where I am going with the whole thing. I typically don’t dream a lot. Lately, however, I’ve had some very vivid ones. Some featuring people I know. Others featuring famous people. I literally can’t even…

Last night’s featured a particularly loathsome politician, one Senator Elizabeth Warren. It was probably because I’d watched her excuse for an address at the Democratic National Convention. She spent a lot of time talking about the wonderful benefits that have been put into place to avoid another financial crisis……like this:

http://reason.com/reasontv/2015/08/21/operation-choke-point-the-governments-co

Thankfully, I can’t remember what this shining star of statism did to me, but it was enough to wake me up.

I bet the young person who was shouting, “we trusted you” to her probably was stoned enough at the end of the night that he slept like a baby.

What to write about tomorrow…?  Hmm.  Well, football training camps are a

Twenty-five

How does weather affect you? 

Nowadays, heat really does a number on me.  It’s something that started long before I was diagnosed, but is very pronounced these days.

So, what happens?

  1. My vision goes.  Anyone who’s talked to me would know that vision loss is my most serious symptom.  That did start long before I was diagnosed.  I can remember getting the weird streaks on the edges of my vision playing softball in college.
  2. Fatigue.  I tire incredibly easily.  I do push myself farther than I probably ought pretty often.  In some ways, I’m still very hungry, professionally, and am excited to be doing work closer to my skillset.
  3. My midsection starts spasming.  If there’s a muscle between my ribcage and my knees, it’ll randomly contract or relax.  That leads me to the next
  4. My diaphragm stops working.  I have trouble breathing. Serious trouble breathing.  Not only is hot, humid air difficult to inhale in the first place, it’s even tougher when you have trouble taking a deep breath of comfortable air.

On the flip side, perhaps due to other nerve problems, cold doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it did when i was younger.  I hated the cold, and tolerated the heat.  These days, it’s exactly the opposite.

http://www.nationalmssociety.org/Living-Well-With-MS/Health-Wellness/Heat-Temperature-Sensitivity

Tonight, after Indian food, I’m sure I’ll sleep very deeply.  This is okay, and brings me to tomorrow’s prompt….

Write about recent dreams.  Do you dream often?  Anything odd lately stick out in your mind?

Twenty-three

Who will you vote for in November, and why?

Unless the polls in the week before the Election say Virginia is within five points, I’m going to vote for Gary Johnson.

Do I have some reservations about him? Absolutely. But he and Weld are a lot closer to where I am.

If Virginia is within the MOE, I’ll hold my nose and vote against Hillary.

Tomorrow’s prompt: It’s supposed to be 100F here in Norfolk tomorrow — how does weather affect you? Tease? The heat bothers me a lot more than it did when I was younger. The cold really doesn’t bother me anymore, though.

Twenty-two

It’s Friday.  What are your weekend plans?

Relax.  It’s going to be incredibly hot here this weekend, so I plan to stay inside as much as I can.  When I get hot, my vision gets even worse than it normally is, my balance goes, and I have trouble breathing.

That doesn’t explain why I fell off the bus Tuesday afternoon.  Yes, I fell off the bus.  Umm, yeah, I don’t even know.  I’d gotten off a stop early the last time I went to this barber shop, and had to walk a pretty good ways down  the street.

Going to work on the bus, I noticed there was a stop pretty much right in front of the shopping center where the barber is.  Being Norfolk, there’s not much in the way of hills, but there is one from the street to the sidewalk.  I stepped off the bus onto the grass between the curb and the sidewalk, and down I went.

(And, yes, this is part of the thinking behind yesterday’s entry on pain…)

Thankfully, I did manage to stay on the grass between the street and the sidewalk, but I came down on my left shoulder hard.

The bus driver saw me fall, and got off the bus to see if I was okay.  He, and a passenger waiting for another bus, helped me drag myself into a shady spot where I sat until I’d done enough to make sure I pretty much had full range-of-motion.

Unfortunately, my left shoulder is where I carry my work bag, and it was too sore to let me comfortably do that.  So, bag to the right shoulder, and cane to the left hand, not in use.  I staggered across the parking lot to the barber, got my hair cut, and got a ride home.

Because I got the ride home, I didn’t run a couple of the other errands I’d planned on the way.  (Yes, I was looking for liquor and beer, which you can’t buy in the same store in the Commonwealth of Virginia….my wife hooked me up on the beer, but i still need to trek to the ABC store for the other stuff.)

The ride home cost me eight bucks, but it was worth not having to stagger back to where I’d just fallen, then get on a different bus headed downtown and home.

Yesterday, I went to see my PCP(s) over at EVMS.  There was a new PA there who saw me.  I swear the guy was as increduluous as many of the young residents I’ve seen about my travails over the six years I’ve been going there for treatment.

Yes, guy, my vision really is that bad!

Yes, i’ve lost that much weight since 2009!

No, there’s nothing glass will do to help;  it’s nerve and brain damage.

He examined my shoulder, and was worried I had a break, so he wanted to do an X-ray.  The attending physician came in, talked to me for a few minutes, established that i had full range-of-motion, and told me to come back next week if it was still bothering me.

It’s not as bad as it was the morning after, but it still hurts a lot about the time when the ibuprofen is wearing off.

Most people are very one-sided when it comes to handedness;  I’ve always been a bit odd.  I find myself doing a lot more things with my left side these days.  Not that I could even hope to play baseball, but I almost feel like actually throwing with my left hand would be natural to me these days.

Yes, that’d be weird.  Not that I could ever hope to actually see well enough to hit, or stand well enough to run and field, but….

I’m rambling.  It happens.  Part of this, though, is to get me back in the writing mode.  What tomorrow?  Hmm, I guess I’ll use one of the prompts I’d taken from my old diary, and revisit it.

Back to the prompt, again. What am I going to do this weekend?  Not much.  It’s too hot to do anything, and I really wish I could have some gin and sweet vermouth delivered.  (Yes, I know those don’t go together, but i have bourbon and plenty of dry vermouth.  I am one ingredient short for both martinis and Manhattans….)

Back to tomorrow’s prompt.

For a large number of folks, the change of the millennium was their first major memory.  Where were you, and what were you doing?

Twenty-one

That’s easy.  I will say that if you think you have the least bit of a dental problem DO NOT GET ON AN AIRPLANE.

I asked this thinking about something I’m going to have to endure soon.  I asked my PCP for a second opinion.  Unfortunately, he agreed with the specialist’s recommendation.  Imagine you’re watching a national news program;  you’ve probably seen ads for people who have to do this.

Reluctantly, I’ll go along.  I’m not getting into too many details, because it’s embarrassing.

So, instead, I’ll get back to the pain on the plane.

I was working in Florida (yes, I know…..).  While I was down there, one of my teeth really started bothering me.  It was a tooth that had been worked on years previously, and hadn’t given me any trouble.  If I’d been scheduled to be down there for more than a few days, I probably would have sought somebody locally.  Instead, this was supposed to be a quick three-day trip, and I’d be home in time to get things fixed.

In fact, we finished up our work a day ahead of schedule, so I rearranged my flights to get home sooner.

I’d purchased some Ambesol at one of the local drug stores to temporarily numb the pain until I got home.  Got on my rescheduled flight.  As soon as the cabin started pressurizing, oh ho indescribable pain.  Like tears coming down pain.

Dabbing Ambesol in the airplane bathroom didn’t help.

After we’d been in the air for about twenty minutes, it subsided to a minor ache.  We landed in Atlanta without issue, though some more pain as we descended.

Consequently, I took advantage of my Amex Platinum, and hit up the airline club in the airport while waiting for my connection.

I downed three gin Martinis, hoping I could just fall asleep on the flight back to Norfolk.

I was seated next to a pilot on ferry

Once again, as in the first le of the flight, as soon as the cabin started pressurizing, holy fuck pain.

By the time we were airborne, I was sweating profusely.  The captain next to me asked what was going on.  I told him.  He flagged down the flight attendant and asked for something.

She didn’t have anything.

So much for sleeping.

And my buzz is totally gone.

I was supposed to see my then-girlfriend (now wife) that weekend.  Instead, I was going to the urgent care clinic for Vicodin and antibiotics.

Root canal on Sunday.

Sometimes having a dentist who does his religious stuff on Saturdays is a good thing.

None of the things that I’ve had as I’ve battled MS have come close to matching that pain.  None.

Here’s where I need to figure out what to gab about tomorrow;.  It’s Friday.  What are your weekend plans?