Month: November 2015

Where do you think you’ll be this time next year?

i honestly have to say that I really don’t have any idea.

There’s so many irons in the fire, I don’t know which one will heat up enough to use first. That may make me have to move. Working from home, something else in Tidewater, DC, Cleveland, Buffalo, NYC, and…? Some are more lucrative than others.

Obviously, the first two have benefits that aren’t really quantifiable.

What I do know is that I’m tired of being in a situation where I’m woefully underpaid, and publicly berated almost every day.

Write a bit about what you do on a “normal” day. Where are you? What are you doing? Are you satisfied with the situation?

This is a bit of an appropriate prompt, because I haven’t had a “normal” day since the beginning of last year.

This situation I’m in has me so out-of-sorts that there’s just nothing to say.

During the week, I’m normally booked into my prison assignment around 0700, and stay there until someone can give me a ride out. Normally, that’s by about 1615, though sometimes I do have to work later.

I’ve never settled into a routine, nor do I really want to, because this is going to be done soon.

One day, some day soon, I’ll have something more substantial to write about. I look forward to that day. Almost as much as I’m looking forward to some downtime/quality time with my wife.

My wife and I were talking this weekend about whether I’d made a mistake taking this job. No. The one with the four-letter, yes.

But, as I said, it’ll be over sooner rather than later.

Back in NoJoMo for 2013, I listed writing as one of the things that used to scare me, but I’ve gotten over it.

I also despaired about how bad some of my old stuff sucked. My writing still sucks. My blog still sucks. But I really don’t care. I write in my journal/blog/diary/whatever for me.

Whatever feedback I get is lagniappe. I do go back and read my drivel on occasion. I try to remember what my state of mind was, and analyze it.

Was I wrong to have felt the way I did?
Was something else about to happen that I was completely blind to?

2013 kinda drives that last one home; had I known how I was about to be unceremoniously dumped, I wouldn’t have been trying as hard as I was to be a good “team player.” And I wouldn’t have been as complacent as I was away at Shmoocon 2014.

Too often the past few years I’ve sold myself short. How many tesn of thousands fo dollars has that cost me?

I’m certainly not the same go-getter I was in, say, 2008. But there isn’t a reason I should be earning less money than I was then.

5. Write about your siblings. How many do you have? What’s the age difference between you and them? Tell a bit about where they live, and what they do.

Yes, this one is a bit of a cop-out; I’ve had one brother for the past 33 years (today). I am a little more than three years his senior.

He did a lot of the things I didn’t want to do when I was younger. I bear no ill will about it. I chose my path, and I’m happy with who I am. Yes, he probably earns a lot more money than I do. Yes, he’s been a lot places I haven’t. Even if we’d done exactly the same things, I don’t know that I would have ended up where he is. I’m okay with that.

Or, to put it another way, I really don’t want to live where he lives. I’m thankful I haven’t had to deal with some of the things he’s had to deal with, either.

As for what he does, well, he puts the air in pingpong balls. I do lose him sometimes on the higher math work he does. I’d bet he would say the same of my bureaucratic prowess. He works for a legendary company in an interesting-sounding place. I probably wouldn’t fit in there.

And I’m not married to a Cowboys’ fan……

I have four relatives’ birthdays in the next five days. I’m blaming Valentine’s Day. Do you have any relatives with birthdays in early November? Write a bit about each of them.
1. Today. A quarter of my genes. Used to like to fish, but sold the boat long ago. Still hanging in there, despite many years.
2. Today. THe only one of the three left, now. Didn’t expect that this time last year, but… Doesn’t talk much due to health issues.
3. Tomorrow. Only person on earth who shares my DNA. I’m wondering if his facial hair growth patterns are as strange as mine. And, with that, I’ve reveled gender. That’s fine. And I’m leaving out my little jibe, here.
4. Sunday. I have half the genes. Much like me, still working, though less reason than I’ve got. Half the genes of two of the others here.

So, that’s that.

It’s the first Monday of the month. Please rank the level of sucktitude on a scale of 1 to 100, then describe your plans for the day.

The answer, of course, is eight.

Why so low?

1. THE ROYALS WON THE WORLD SERIES
2. What’s making my life at miserable at work isn’t here. So, there’s that.

I am very tired, as that game didn’t finish until almost 2am. yawn

Am I surprised by all this? Certainly. I didn’t think it was possible, in this world of uncapped salaries, for a small-market team like Kansas City to put together a competetitive team.

They did.

Would the story hav eeen different if they’d been playing in the AL East? Maybe. It’s very difficult to compete with NYC, Boston money.

Otherwise, I don’t have a lot to say today.

I’m refamiliarizing myself with “The FAR,” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Federal_Acquisition_Regulation) even though it seems as none of the higher-ups give a fuck about it.

I’m going to do what’s right, not what’s expident. If you want to fire me because of that, please bring it. I’m sure some folks in the trial law field will enjoy having me as a client…..

sigh

So there’s that.

Today is the last day of the month. Free write about the month, and your experience writing this month.

Like so many things in my life, I don’t feel like I’ve had time to really concentrate on this. Even if I had, it still probably would have been pretty disjointed.

This situation in my life isn’t working at all right now, and I’m exhausted.

What more can I say?

I got through this for another year.

Who is your patron saint? If you are not a member of the global Papist conspiracy, explain a bit about what you know about Sainthood. (And the awesome Tegan and Sara album is totally acceptable, here.)

Obligatory BuzzFeed quiz says I got the guy who is the patron saint of the unemployed.

I’m not unemployed, but I’m more than a little dissatisfied with my current situation, so it might be appropriate.

So, today, in addition to watching the Saints’ game on TV (with the Redskins off?), I’ve been looking hard.

We shall see.

But another busy week ahead, I think. “Work,” finding health insurance for next year (since my company doesn’t offer anything accepted locally, and my current plan leaves much to be desired….and isn’t available next year), coming home Tuesday to vote, and….?

Let’s see if the Royals win tonight.