Author: sean

How are you similar or different from the person you were 5 years ago? 10 years ago? 20 years ago?

Five years ago? Well, it’s still up. I was obviously getting very concerned about some of what I saw going on with things like Facebook at the time. I wish I could have known more about

I’m trying to remember exactly what the impetus was for me trying to get away from the Ginger Drop-out’s stuff back then, but I’d need to read more to figure it out. Obviously, things would go into overdrive in 2020. I did appreciate that whatever efforts I’d taken back then would pay dividends pretty soon thereafter.

Still, I think I showed that, yes, you can say, “see ya.”

The technologies behind the Internet aren’t locked in to one company’s wares.

All that can be done is passing laws to try to “fix” that.

So, your solution is to throw people in prison.

There’s just no nice to reframe that into something polite.

If you ever say “there should be a law,” you’re saying “I feel so strongly about this that I’m willing to have you killed to get you to behave the way I want.”

Ten Years ago?

It’s here. I think, probably, this would have been just as I was in the early throws of the thing I’d taken because we were running out of money.

As far as I know, that place is probably still operating. But I was very much not in my element. That was reconfirmed yesterday when I was doing similar work. Windows was, and still is, a nightmare.

But i’d gotten hired as the junior admin there, and I was doing it really to just pay the bills. The company I was with didn’t offer any benefits accepted by providers in Tidewater.

I’d bought a private plan from one of the providers down there that was one of the large providers. It was expensive, but we didn’t have a ton of expenses with my wife in college.

The wonderful exchange plan we would have for the next year was the thing that really sent me into a spiral.

Again, I got promoted on-the-spot into the role of the senior admin because they couldn’t do an in-place capture of the previous admin.

i tried, but I was being directed to do things from 1999. In 2014.

No, we shouldn’t be doing this. You should never say that to someone who views himself as a subject matter expert on things he clearly doesn’t understand at all.

Twenty years ago? I went back and looked at stuff around then. There was an entry about someone in whom I was interested. I really have no idea who that was, actually. Not even a suspicion.

The next one was me congratulating myself from what I did on the Thanksgiving turkey.

I think I did it on a grill. It may have been my first attempt at using an injector of some sort.

I think my dad was in Iraq that year, so I was cooking for my mom, my brother, and his wife at the time. It worked, I guess, but I didn’t write down what I did. I am an idea — I think it probably involved a glaze and injection that resembled a whisky sour.

So, that’s some quick recaps

For the future, who knows? Obviously, I had some major setbacks in the middle of that period.

The samples from the prompt are largely related to the problems I’ve had related to my health in the past fifteen years.

Should I have done anything differently? Yep.

But I did find someone I love, something you couldn’t have told me I’d do twenty years ago.

i didn’t have a prompt here. Glancing back through what I’d written on previous November 26ths, I get this.

I would say that Detroit looks a hell of a lot better than it did in 2016. Certainly, the Lions are a lot better. I don’t like some of the things that the Democrats there have done lately,

I really don’t like that Michigan repealed its right-to-work law.

if I was a legislator considering these things, I probably wouldn’t be considered “an ally.”

Want to repeal “right-to-work?” Um, okay, then. Any union who operates in one of these situations can’t fund politicians, parties, and campaigns. It’s one or the other.

You also see the sort of situation that now exists at places like Chrysler and GM where workers basically get no workplace benefits; everything comes from the union. And there’s only four (4) pay bands. Even if you’re one of the best employees, you’re going to get paid exactly the same as someone who sucks, because you’re in the same pay band.

Oh, by the way, you’re also only working 35 hours per week because the politicians we funded have made it so that we can’t get rid of the extra people we’ve got employed.

A Harris administration would have revived some really bad things like The PRO ACT. Link from my former representative.

I think “gig work” is going to be a big thing for a lot of people. There really isn’t a way to put the toothpaste back in the tube.

So, what else?

This guy was arrested after being on the Ten-Most-Wanted list for more than twenty years.

Glad to see. I was wondering if there was an Unsolved Mysteries about it. I remember seeing something. Maybe it was America’s Most Wanted. I don’t remember, and am not motivated to search to find it.

I can’t really tell if the relaunch has already been cancelled.

It’s a shame that my suspicions about this are heightened. Why was this released now?

Okay. Enough for today. Time to find some dinner.

I glanced again at what I’d written a while ago, and that led me to think about

Music

What have you been listening to? What has come out lately that you like?

As I’ve been listening a lot more to Apple Music a lot lately while I exercise. I typically take a screenshot of something that’s gotten me going, o rI think might be of others’ interest on Malice’s Locals.

I try to make it a point to listen to some of the op new stuff playlists, but often end up reverting to various stuff from either my high school days, or the 1990s.

There’s some study about how your musical tastes are set sometime when you’re in high school.

You could say that I’m 1993. Who was the informer on that? A lickie boom boom down.

Sure there way a lot more interesting, then, but 1993 is the year.

Getting to your recently played is incredibly tough. I find myself hitting >> on the controls on a lot of the newer stuff.

The strange Country mismatches are completely befuddling to me. Thankfully, I do hear more songs that resemble constructions. While I do enjoy, and have written about songs with odd assembly in the past, like Bob Seeger’s Still The Same, which has no chorus.

Listen here, and find the chorus. G’head

So, I appreciate that there is more conventional assembly in the popular music. Have I heard some stuff I like? Sure. Can I spend a lot of time at it?

Have I gotten fed things maybe I’d forgotten about, but had kind of forgotten about? Yep. Does it, like one of the concert promoters think I’m a GenX woman? Yep.

Most of it I like, so maybe the logic is working?

I do end up S’ingTFW for some after I hear it, and end up feeling really old.

Oh well.

Almost finished. I need to go write a bit more about something else….

Free-Write

I had a bunch of stuff written, but ended up scrapping it after a commercial completely upset my line of thinking.

I need to do a better job of risk assessment. There’s been a few major instances where I’ve made mistakes.

Unfortunately, I don’t think a couple of those had any upside, really.

Professionally, I made sacrifices to keep the lights on.

With better understanding of the intricacies of health insurance, some of the bad things I experienced I probably would do differently.

You get really messed over if you don’t have “employer-sponsored” health care. Even if you hav eto do things out-of-network, all hte money you’d pay for COBRA is pre-tax.

When you get your cafeteria menu, I’d say pass up as much that isn’t going to be expensive.

I don’t really know, and I don’t know that I have the paperwork, still, to redo the analysis.

I had the thought back then that you needed to make sure you only used “in-network” providers.

No, no you don’t.

Even if your provider is out-of-network, but you like him/her, stick around. You’re gonna take a hit until you’re reimbursed by the insurer, but you’ll stick with the providers(s) with whom you’re comfortable.

I do need to learn to not fall into going forward. I think I was relying on the oh-so-sage advice of people who’ve bought a lot of letters behind their names to advance in human resources.

What else? Um, spinning into football, considering it’s Sunday morning.

I have no idea with college, still. But I always like seeing Ole Miss and Lane Kiffin lose.

The NFL, who knows. Sounds like the Jets have given up on Aaron Rodgers. And their coaches.

The Saints seem to have woken back up after the Dennis Allen disaster. Still don’t like the “West Coast” offense. Sofa King Boring.

Also following with mild interest the coming MSNBC fire sale. Rumors on the internets say that Don Jr. is pushing Elon Musk to buy it. I know Elon’s got the money to do it, but why? Sister Rachel took a pay cut for her half and hour a week, but why would you want to have anything to do with that disaster?

I’m reminded of Michael Dell’s dismissive take on Apple in the late-90s.

But there’s really no assets to liquidate and send back to the shareholder.

But is there anything there worth salvaging? is there something like NeXT you can combine with it to make something better? Rogan’s network? The Blaze?

Or you try to lose more money than Space Cowboy Bezos?

Time for some coffee.

I still didn’t have anything. So, back to 2012:

1. What are your vices?

The normal stuff; alcohol, caffeine, meth, opiates, nicotine, gambling.

Some of those aren’t true. Decide for yourself which ones.

2. “The most disappointed I’ve ever been…”

You know, I honestly don’t know nowadays. I try not to focus on failures, you know? Especially now, Going to meet with criminal investigators about someone ranks right up there….

The answers are really unchanged.

Obviously, the “meth” from back then was in jest, but the other things are still basically true. I’ve really varied the amounts here and there, but I still partake in the same bits.

But I really don’t get a lot of enjoyment from any of those vices anymore.

Did I really back then? I don’t know.

That does kind of feed into the disappointment piece. If I don’t ever really enjoy anything, I have trouble being that disappointed.

Things happen, and all I’ll have at the end is the memory of me screwing up royally.

Maybe that’s no way to live, but it’s kind of my nature. I’m incredibly captious, intentional even.

Maybe that attitude has seen me miss out on fun, but I’ve also missed out on a lot of real disappointment.

Something to discuss in a future therapy session.

Somehow the Apple Music interlude of Cake’s Sheep Go To Heaven seems strangely appropriate here.

But I’m not really a sheep; they don’t have the requisite amount or self-reflection. You’re never going to see any sort of after-action review from a sheep. Even if there’s nothing formal, I do review many things to myself.

And I usually come back with “I wouldn’t have acted differently.”

Yeah, there’s been some times that I was absent information that led to an incorrect decision; if I’d known that K——- had reached a plea agreement that’d lead to me being laid off when I got “home,” I would have been glad-handling at Shmoocon in 2014, but I didn’t know.

I was trying to do the best job I could do even though I was being mistreated.

So it goes. I can be comfortable with myself.

I didn’t have a prompt ready for today. The Thanksgiving plans I wrote about are OBE courtesy the weather forecast. I’m rather sanguine about the development. Just us together, and that’s okay. The example of what happened in the Browns-Steelers game last night played a part in the cancellation for later in the week.

The cold weather got here to DC yesterday. I’m wondering how unpleasant it’ll be when I limp across to the community gym tomorrow. That said, it’s really not that far, and it’s something that helps me make some progress into getting back to living a somewhat-normal life.

I wonder if bad weather is going to be an excuse for a lot of holiday plan cancellations.

*wanders onto X to see if there’s anything trending*

Oh. MSNBC.

That would be funny as hell.

Bits, too, and I’m too lazy to really search for it, is what’s happened at The Washington Post. First DDG search result on losses yields this government radio bit about a portion of the few remaining subscribers fleeing after the Jeff refused to endorse Officer Harris.

It’s a bit like buying a Blockbuster, Randy.

But this is stuff that was foreseeable. I did think Netflix was a pipe-dream. Same with BlazeTV.

But things change.

I’m reminded of the Howard Zinn book title, “You Can’t Be Neutral on a Moving Train.”

Doesn’t quite fit, but it’s the first thing that crossed my mind.

Also, fuck that guy.

What inspires you to keep writing?

Answer from 2017:

Right now?  That I’m waiting for these repairmen to return, finish the job I hired them for.

More generally?  It keeps me somewhat level.  I can sit back, close my eyes, and pound something out.

For Novembers, it allows me to reflect some on where I am, correct mistakes I’ve made, and find some peace in time for the holidays.

The stretch from September of last year until July of this year is a complete blur.  (Well, that’s the case of many, many things, on account of my failing vision, but….)

I think I still can do some quality work, although I have to approach things differently.  Things really scream by.  I hope that I haven’t disappointed too many people.

My desire for revenge is kind of gone.  Things do occasionally pop up that I have to look into, dig back through my archives, and inquire whether there’s something that might bite me.

So much of what’s coming out in the news is about behavior I just can’t comprehend.  Have I done things I regret?  Absolutely.  Is any nearly as bad as what (long string of celebrities) did?

Not by a longshot.

I still haven’t had the opportunity to delve into stuff from 2012 thoroughly. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe Friday Who knows? For tomorrow:  How do you feel about people’s need to post every detail of their relationships on social media? Are you guilty?

In previous years, it was really just something to see if I could do it. Obviously, I’ve more than shown that I can.

The summer writing periods were something to get my mind off the horrible situation in which I’d been placed.

My psychologist says that it’s a symptom of OCD. Obviously, I haven’t written during the summers in a while, and this may very well be my last November. This is fifteen years. The first time I did it, I was a newlywed seeking to figure out if there was anything creative I could do.

I’m not really doing that much reflecting at this point. This year, while, yes, there’s some things I’m lining up for the rest of the year, things are somewhat predictable.

Am I bored with it? I don’t know. It’s not really a chore, but I think I’m so busy that it’s something I have to remind myself to do. My early idea of setting aside a specific time each day came and went.

Oh well.

This year’s been spent working way too much. Maybe I’ll get some benefit from that, but I’m not holding my breath.

The stupidity with the election is over, so I can peek in on that and see what’s going to happen. I don’t have high hopes, but there are some streaks of promise. Elon Musk posting videos of Milton Friedman is great, but I kind of think that things are past the point of rescue; bad things are on the horizon.

So, find something to enjoy, maybe. Silo is back, but I go back and forth as to whether we should get a start on it, or wait until it’s all dropped.

As I said recently, I do have some medical stuff to do, but that’s not until next year. I haven’t seen any donor meetups for the things I support. Football isn’t great, but I am kind of interested to see what Jameis Winston does to the former Failcons guy tonight.

Maybe I should get back into the rhythm of pointing something out as I wrote about in the old entry about this? Ummmm The doc disagrees.

Still, two-thirds finished which is a bit of an accomplishment. I’m getting proved right more and more with work, which has led to me being sidelined on decisions where I might pipe up with disagreement.

Just ignore him; he doesn’t let us waste the money we want.

What Are You Looking Forwards To Next Year?

I think I might have had a thought about something that’d sparked my interest when I was trying to come next year.

I’m not really sure, to be perfectly honest. I’m kind of luxating in the fact that something I was worried was going to disrupt my holiday plans.

As I’ve said, I’m looking forward to attending the final Shmoocon. If I can get tickets.

Am I looking forward to the change in Administration in DC at the end of January? Mmmm….

Well, I didn’t vote for him, because I have serious questions about how things are going to work with the incredible Federal debt, and looming Social Security problems.

Things like Elon Musk’s tweetpost should inspire excitement, but it’s just not there.

I just can’t find the optimism Elon has. I still think things are about to get really, really, really bad, and it’s not primarily because of something the US has done; sorry Libertarian Institute folks.

So. What else might be interesting? I don’t know. There’s some interesting teams in the NFL, though there’s a disgusting uniformity among many of the teams. It’s nice to see that what Sean Payton’s doing in Denver looks to be finally catching on, but there’s so much else that’s just dull “West Coast Offense”/Cover-2 zone defense.

I am somewhat excited by the potential of some of what I’m doing work-wise, though I am a bit worried that what I’ve been tasked with might be overcome by events.

On the health side, I’m curious to see what’s going on with my health, but I don’t think I’m going to have any real answers until the middle of the summer.

I guess we’ll see. But it does feel like a long way off.

Things Get Better

This is one of the things that I really have been on lately. In fact, I was discussing it with someone this morning.

I think it was in relation to the reignited discussion of fluoridation in public water.

There might be some negative health effects from fluoridated water. I don’t know. I do know that public water supply fluoridation was something implemented during the twentieth century to fight tooth decay.

The measure served a good public health purpose in the 1950s and 1960s. If you lost your teeth, your only option was dentures.

While the number of TV ads for various pharmaceuticals has gone through the roof in the past twenty years, I’d like to see a line graph overlayed with the decline in the number of ads for denture cleaners and bonding agents.

Why?

The price has come down significantly. I do have a dental implant. It was a necessity due to problems from not having my wisdom teeth removed soon enough.

While the actual surgery to have the implant installed wasn’t fun, it’s been there for almost twenty years without a problem.

today, you can find someone who’ll do basically a full set of teeth for really not a lot of money. If one of the ceramic or composite teeth attached to the implant is damaged, you just replace the false tooth.

That sort of improvement was completely unthinkable not terribly long ago.

But, no, we’ve gotta keep putting fluoride in the water to, you know, keep ceramic teeth from decaying.

Things Get Better.

There’s so many aspects of life that are immeasurably better than they were not a long time ago.

Science builds atop what’s been discovered in the past. Things that once were very expensive become cheap due to ubiquity.

While medical advancements are the first thing that come to mind, it’s true in so many other areas of life.

In the vast majority of instances, the regulations from the past can just go by the wayside. And people won’t be worse off.

Part of this was prompted by thinking about watching the snowfall on the hill behind the Clinical Research Unit at Georgetown in, um, 2019? I was enjoying the warm radiator against my thighs as I waited to make sure the Tysabri infusion I’d just gotten wasn’t going to kill me.

The warmth of the radiator brought back memories of my childhood in Germany.

But you wouldn’t build a building with giant boilers to feed radiators for heating anymore. Hot water is dispensed fairly quickly from devices that only heat what’s needed. Indoor climes are regulated by small, efficient devices requiring a lot less fuel than the old boilers did.

I also probably wouldn’t build a house with a septic system if I could avoid it. Public sewers have had an incredible effect on public health.

Things Get Better.