Twenty-six (8/15)

Yeah, completely out-of-sorts today.

Another incredibly busy day.

I promised on TwitterX that I’d expound on what I’d written on Lions of Liberty Locals about this Rich Men North of Richmond song.

Not sure what to do w/ Rich Men North of Richmond. I guess I get part of it, but, really for the Byrd Organization-supporting Keep-Virginia-Blue types, the Commonwealth ends where the HOV lanes stop on 95. And, no….those aren’t RON PAUL voters. They’re Jim Webb, Doug Wilder, and Ralphie Northam voters. DPVA has gone full re^H ^H ^H ^H ^H ^H ^Hbatshit crazy.  Living in Democrat-since-the-Yankee-occupiers-left-in-1877 localities, I often vote in the Democrat primary….and it’s often to vote against whichever nut the DerpProgress crowd has rolled out. I did that in 2020, too, specially to vote against Liz Warren (who’s a hell of a lot whiter than I….)

The RON PAUL fans were trying to make this guy sound like a RON PAUL fan. No, I’m thinking that’s not it, even if he’s talking about the dollar not being worth shit.

I know they’re hated by both the Keynesians and the Austrian acolytes, but a lot of folks from the Chicago School explain that price is a function of supply, demand, and available circulating money.

That last element has been in an overabundance, certainly since the pandemic pump priming, but I would say that it’s been going on since about 1995.

Interest rates have been held far below i9nflation since President Clinton, et. al., kept interest rates way below where they should be.

What goes up in price? Equities (so stocks), and Real assets (Housing).

Apologies for the brief interlude into this, but it’s the same in many areas.

Look at how back higher education is. You have a slack demand, now, because people my age didn’t form babby because we were worried about getting AIDS after there weren’t many of us to begin with.

The loans are completely guaranteed by the Federal Government.

When there was a peak in demand about ten years ago, now it’s nothing.

What can you do?

Reviewed the prompts I have left, and nothing is really catching me.

I’m going to go watch the news, sip a Godfather, and try to recoup for tomorrow.

Twenty-five (8/14)

Really tacking back to pre-9/11 entries to see where I was, mentally, back then.

Holding Everything Together
I sometimes wonder why, exactly, I’m the only one I know who totally seems to have things together….why I don’t have any devestating problems….why my issues are less significant than other people’s. It all seems so improbable…that I’d make it this far without majorly fucking something up…being in a situation where things have gone totally wrong, and there are questions about whether I’d ever get out of the situation.

And going back to my little advice problem (that it always seems like everyone I know is coming to me for advice, and I’m never going to them…that I’m constantly solving problems, while never wanting to burden anyone with even the tiniest thing)….

Maybe my time just hasn’t come yet? What a dreadful thought. FUD speak. But then again, I can’t foresee anything….

Confused?

You bet.

But then again, I’ve been shit on a fair amount. I can’t imagine dealing with Spring ’99 again. Hmm.

Off in space…excuse me.

Yep. That’s pretty much me, still, even after all of my problems. I try to help other people with their problems while acting like mine aren’t there.

Was I having symptoms back then? Um, yep. You bet.

In a hall of mirrors where each mirror reflects a character trait, you see yourself as you really are.

I’m trying to hide myself as best I can? With that one, my oft-repeated mantra of “you can leave” is tougher. Every attempt you make to disguise yourself gets tougher.

Maybe that has something to do with my odd attraction to houses with a basement?

If you can’t leave, make yourself as invisible as possible.

And my initial response is to say something about how I shouldn’t worry; I’m not that interesting, anyway. (Yes, doc, I know I’m not supposed to say things like htat..)

Oh well.

Twenty-four (8/13)

Up very early for a dentist appointment. What had been a roundabout at the end of the street that leads to Old Town was replaced with a more conventional intersection in the past two-and-a-half weeks. My wife, who was going for her cleaning, noticed. I did not, immediately, but I think I would have.

One of the biggest things I’ve noticed in places other than Tidewater, is that roadways change pretty quickly.

Maybe that pairs with some of what I’m dealing with work.

There’s just such reluctance to do anything different.

We have our way of doing things, and they’re correct forever.

Looking for something to write today, I stumbled across this. This thing I’m dealing with as a temporary fill-in is really setup that way. We work this way. We’ve been working this way for twenty years. Whatever you might want to do to change it is wrong. We don’t know why we’re operating this way, but it is the way.

Which kind of natural disaster would you find the most terrifying to experience?

The fire in Maui does kinda fit the bill. My wife and I were watching some of the BBC coverage of it last night. Geez. And, thinking about it, England might be about as far away as you can get on the planet from Maui.

Much as I dislike linking to Space Cowboy Jeff’s sewer, they do have the story about how the government power company didn’t shut off the lines to prevent more fires from being sparked by downed lines.

See, we have a process for shutting off the service. You didn’t have a Form E-193 signed by five people that we need to shut off service….

Now my debate is whether I want to try to stay up, and watch the Saints’ preseason game….or take a nap.

I think the latter option is going to win.

Twenty-three (8/12)

After the past few days’ marathons, back to the disturbing dreams. Yes, it’s on the to-talk-about-list with my psychologist when I see her next.

I couldn’t resist writing that down, and it ended up with me being awake for several hours.

But it was something so, um, noteworthy, that I had to get it down for memory.

From this day in 2001….


Cat Mutilations
Heard about it on Dreamland the other night. I suppose the aliens have gotten bored with cows.

This weekend was a loser. Friday night was beer and burgers at the pub. Saturday night was tequila and wings in Norfolk. Had a hangover on Sunday and I didn’t even get drunk. How much does that suck?

Anyone heard “Clint Eastwood,” by Gorrilaz? I’m not sure I get it. Is it like a white-boy takeoff on Puffy? What is with these people?

My annoyance has once again delayed his departure. He was supposed to be gone this past Monday. Now it’s wednesday night at the earliest. And he’s got company until he leaves. Wonderful.

It’s 4:35, and I’ve been here since 7:30 last night.

I need to find something fun to do tonight.

Or else.

Bleh.

Work.

At this moment, I have absolutely no motivation to do anything, yet my productivity at work tonight has been stunning. I’ve said that I’d be totally unproductive and I wouldn’t care about anything if I had a girlfriend…but I feel totally unproductive and don’t care about anything while I’m single. Yet I get things done. Explain that one.

Want a laptop, damnit. I’m wondering if I’ll get anything for my birthday. Maybe a stripper. No, I take that back. Don’t need to deal with the ex on my birthday. For those of you who care, that’s a week from tomorrow.


Even back then I was working. I really don’t know that I’ve had a period where I just didn’t do anything for a long time.

Oh well.

My brain is always plugging away at things.

That is a problem.

Write about getting lost and finding an alternative way – it can be literal or metaphorical

This kinda fits in with some of the strange drams I’ve had in the past few months….being stuck in a place, not being able to find a way out, and running out of the energy to search for new ways.

But when can I take a break to get away from everything? I have the financial means, but there’s still responsibilities I can’t bring myself to shirk.

Maybe that should be my focus for a while?

Next milepost is next May, I guess. Keep chugging until then.

Twenty-two (8/11)

Another incredibly long day that involved a trip to Amazoniaville.

Strange being in the same area where you used to work, trying to get your bearings.

But it’s done. I might can have a couple of days off, finally.

I tried to revisit old entries to find something to tackle.

5. What is the ugliest name?
Hortense.

I think I probably still agree with that from April 2004.

Reading through those, however, I find that there’s still agree with.

Makes me think of Chomsky’s creationist generative grammar. There is something innate in reactions to certain things….and I don’t know that you can ever change those reactions.

Even if mores have changed.

Another from Tracker…

“Wow, I didn’t know you could do that with chapstick!”

I don’t wanna write about that. But there were garment removals later, if memory serves.

I’m stuffed with aromatic Indian food, and not really paying attention.

But I’m generally felling accomplished.

And I’ve worked all the hours I was supposed to for the pay period. I’ll probably end up doing a lot more, but whatever.

Twenty-one (8/10)

Freewrite

Well, yet another one.

I’m waiting for my doctor to get on the camera for my telehealth visit. She’s clearly running behind.

But I was running around this morning. It went somewhat well, but there’s more I have to do tomorrow.

Progress on fixing the immediate difficulties. Unfortunately, it’ll only push me until next spring.

But it’s something, I suppose.


And disrupted by her finally getting on. She’s happy with the MRI results, so that’s a relief. I can also take ibuprofen, which the drugmaker was kind of pushing me away from, so that should make me feel a bit better.

Am I really two-thirds of the way through this streak?

Yep.

Another frenetic day awaits. Then maybe some relief for the weekend.

Twenty (8/9)

Another day so busy. I think they want me to run all over the place tomorrow. I will sign on early in the morning, and go from there. I do need to be home in the afternoon so I can meet with my neurologist.

Yesterday’s shot wasn’t terrible. I guess that I was going to sleep just as I really started feeling lousy. Wasn’t great when I woke up, but I did pretty much sleep through the night.

Work today, on the other hand, was exhausting again. Fingers crossed that I can get things finished so I can take a couple of days off to start next week.

But this whole thing has had me feeling a little proud of myself. I kept my word to the guy who hired me, despite odd recruiter calls for a good long time.

I really suck at patting myself on the back. Another of the many things where I’m not great.

Whatever.

I’m not embarrassed by anything I’ve done.

Free-write tomorrow for the two-thirds mark.

Nineteen (8/8)

Another incredibly busy day that’s really prevented me from thinking about or doing anything other than work.

Another day. More forms. More actual trips I really have to take by the end of the week.

I was actually really nervous about taking my injection tonight.

I told my neurologist about it, and have a virtual appointment with her on Thursday.

Another in-personal appointment for something else tomorrow.

Ugh.

But I feel like I’m scrambling, and really getting things done with work.

Let’s see what happens.

Villagers awake to find that a strange well has appeared in the center of town.

I really don’t know what a well here in Alexandria would produce. Lots of dirty DC and MDDR ground water seeping in?

Got through the nighttime shift. OMFG.

Maybe I’ll get some more substantive writing this weekend.

Eighteen (8/7)

Again. So incredibly busy.

There is a system I’m supposed to temporarily manage that’s required more that twenty (20) forms for access.

Are the lefthanded processes designed to prevent what happened — someone else taking responsiblity for the steaaming pileoutstanding legacy system?

Make. It. Through.

Writing is going to be interrupted here soon because the weather is about to get nasty here on the endge of the Beltway Swamp.

Flashback to 2018 because I guess there were bills I’d paid previously that the recepient company never cashed.

Um. How does Senator Tuna Melt keep getting re-eelcted?

Fantasy setup. Some bills paid. Looks like I might be able to get my money out of this scam I’d gotten embroiled with.

But I think I’m going to go grab a nap while the storm’s raging.

Seventeen (8/6)

I checked some of my writing on this day from years ago….

Writing about the operation for CCSVI.

I stumbled across The Bear. I really wasn’t that intrigued until I heard Peter Superman recommend it. His previous of The Silo was very well-received at home. Just sitting watching TV with my wife is enjoyable.

Thank you to Tracker for the prompts. They’re coming in handy.

Your worst haircut.

Oh, I don’t really know. A significant part of my head hair is gone courtesy my genetics.

I’ve taken to pretty much doing a clipper cut, and that gets progressively shorter.

But I figured by this far into my forties, a significant portion of it would be gray. I also presumed I’d be able to grow a full beard by now.

So much for either of those.

Otherwise, I think I’ve really been taking it easy this weekend.

Long week ahead.