Twenty-six (8/14)

Trying to dig through things I have marked as Draft here.

This has been floating around lately.
How can you purport to support “Net Neutrality” while supporting this sort of editing?

I don’t know.  I think I wrote about that plenty of times.

You can’t be butthurt about Ajit Pai changing rules about Net Neutrality while at the same time favoring private organizations making choices to block speech.

Here’s where I am with it — there’s lots of shit on the Internet that I choose not to consume.  Let me reiterate with emphasis;  there’s lots of shit on the Internet that I choose not to consume.  That it’s there has no effect, whatsoever, on me.

It’d be foolish for me to worry about things that do not affect me.

My Tysabri infusion really hasn’t kicked in yet, though I do feel better than I did, say, Thursday and Friday.  More than a little miffed that my former insurer called me seeking information so they can try to fleece my new insurer, too.

Supposedly my wife has a new prompt she wanted to see me write on.  I guess we’ll see.

Thankfully, though, I don’t have to work this weekend.  I’m trying hard to be upset about that, though I am a bit disappointed that I can’t choose to have fun a couple of days next week.  Whatever.

Twenty-five (8/13)

I was looking around trying to find things I’d written August 13ths in the past.

There’s really not a lot.

Reading back, though, there’s really four phases of my adult life.

College

After-college

After meeting my wife

After the medical establishment figuring out WTF is wrong with me.

Unfortunately, there’s no individual events I can place on the beginnings and ends of those phases.  Of course, I couldn’t have known the hell that my body was going to go through.  I couldn’t have known that the girl across the table with the shy smile, and pretty eyes would end up being with me.

Today went better than I could have expected at work.  Though it took a long time, I got my infusion.  So we’ll see what the rest of the week looks like.

Today, certainly, wouldn’t be anything I could mark as a beginning or end.

A few days left.  What do I want to write about?

Twenty-four (8/12)

From last year. after Charlottesville….


Yesterday was bad.

A lot of the day I spent watching coverage of what was going on in Charlottesville.

(How does Chrome’s inline spell-check think that I misspelled that?)

It doesn’t matter, though. People are lining up on two sides. I, naturally, hold both groups with disdain. Who’s worse? The neo-Nazis. No question. But the Antifa creeps are just that.

The frearless governor of Virginia told the Neo-Nazis to go home, and don’t come back. Yes. I say the same thing to the fucks who provoked them. I also say it to the people of his party who are trying to shove the party’s racist past down The Memory hole.

But you have to erase anything that might spoil your pretense when you’re going to point to how evil others are.

My take on it is a little different than most, certainly. The more I learn about my lineage, the less I know for sure. I do know that my mostly-white father left Mississippi in the early-70s to go kill a Commie for Mommy, and GTFO of the solid South. My grandmother used to tell stories of how the first time she was eligible to vote, her father (my great-grandfather) told her very forcefully that she was going to go vote for “Hairy-Ass” Truman. No, she went and voted for Dewey, but didn’t tell her dad that.

He was the son of two off-the-boat Irish immigrants with eleven kids living in very-blue Mississippi, and an adherent to Papist conspiracy.


Yesterday saw me getting into it with people on Twitter.  Once again, perhaps even more forcefully than a year ago, I find myself as a party of one.

I’m listening to Dave Smith’s discussion about it on his most recent Part of the Problem podcast.

“I’m disgusted by a swastika, and a hammer and sickle>”  Yep.  Pretty much.

But what happened last year, and the reaction served to further categorize everyone into two groups.

No, there’s not only two sides to every issue.  I can be opposed to both the national socialism, and democratic socialism.

Government exists to protect individual rights;  life, liberty, and property.

Oh, but “property” isn’t listed in the Declaration of Independence!!1!  But it is in the Fourteenth Amendment, saying that the government cannot abridge it without due process of law.

I guess things are lining up miles to my east to try to do this again in DC.

I won’t be going.

But I also won’t fall into lockstep with the predictable filtering tomorrow.

Twenty-three (8/11)

It’s a hot day here in the DC ‘burbs.  I’d just assume not go anywhere until I actually have my Tysabri infusion.  I’m wiped.

Of course, the dimwit Nazis are coming into the District today.  I had a lot to say about what happened in Charlottesville last year, as we hit the one-year mark.  I will write then.  That said, this (http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/401293-some-dc-restaurants-will-refuse-service-to-white-nationalists) showed up on Twitter this morning.

I don’t know what to say about it, other than obey the law.  If I owned a restaurant in DC this weekend, I would likely be open.  I’d be selling bottled water, and nothing else.  That way, I wouldn’t be yielding to the fucking Nazis, or violating the Civil Rights Act of 1964.  My employees would have the day off, and it’d just be me at the door selling water I’d ordered from Sam’s Club at $30 per bottle.

Twenty-two (8/10)

Free-writing on this one.

So what’s up with me.

  • ((long description baleeted))  I’m not getting my infusion until next week.  This sucks more than I can even say.  When we move, if we’re close to the neurology clinic, I’m getting away from this bunch of incompetent folks.
  • Trying to figure out how to deal with household problems is tough when you’re hours away.
  • The new dentist I visited this morning has this weird paint-on fluoride he’s using.  It feels strange.
  • I really do like my job, and I feel strange not working during the day.  But I ran out of billable hours, so I’ll deal with the alone time.
  • Do I want lunch?  I really didn’t eat breakfast because I was going to the dentist.
  • Putting periods on a bulleted list feels very wrong.  At the same time, if I had a 1980s MBA, everything I ever wrote would be in a bulleted-list.  In Power Point.
  • I did finally fill the final slot in the Fantasy Football league with my friend from college.  With at least half the league being up here in NoVA, I’m hoping that people will be interested in doing a time or two of drinking.
  • It took me three days to get through this one podcast.  It’s incredible how completely out-of-touch some of the folks are.  (And I can’t read that without hearing it in Bill O’Reilly’s voice.  Fuck it.  We’ll do it live!)

I could keep writing, but the motivation has completely vanished.

I wish there was beer delivery here.

Twenty-one (8/9)

Getting things set up for my Tysabri infusion is getting to be incredibly frustrating.

Again.

I told the nurse at the infusion site, “This is getting to be —-a-frustrating.”  No kidding.

I was due for my infusion yesterday.  They couldn’t get the paperwork straightened out, so who knows when I’ll actually get it.

This is a fuck.

Because I’m feeling lazy, recycling from January of 2011.


Lifted from a fave, ——–, because I wanted to have something to occupy thoughts other than doing work, and worrying about being in DC weekend after next. Forecast low next Friday is -1F.

What is your opinion of sex?: Important tool to unite a couple, but… love can last beyond post-orgasmic glow.

Do you drink alcohol frequently?: Yes. But I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been *drunk.* My doctor seems to think that alcohol probably ain’t a bad thing for me at this point if I’m not overdoing it.

How many of your friends are addicted to drugs?: Hard stuff? No. Caffiene? absolutely. Alcohol? Maybe a few.

What is one genre of music that the world could do without?: Whatever it is they play in European Football stadiums.

Do you shave every inch of your body?: No. Face. I trim elsewhere when necessary.

Do you think that texting on a date is rude?: For the most part, yes.

How many people have you kicked out of your life?: A couple. I have forgiven some of them. Others, well, whatever.

Do you enjoy the little things in life?: I try to. Simple pleasures are important to me, because of that possibility that they might be gone sometime.

Are you a fast or slow learner?: Slower since my eyes got bad.

Would you ever consider being a foster parent?: If I wasn’t sick, and though I could, I’d consider. It wouldn’t be fair for me now.

Do you still like the Disney Channel?: I haven’t watched much since about 1990.

Are the J-Bros & Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus overrated?: Uh? I don’t know. Yes, I know who they are, but, I’m a little old. Ask my wife. Besides, I thought it was all about Bieber now?

Where is one place that you’ve been that you’ll never go to again?: Too many to list. Muckov, Czech Republic.

Have you ever just wanted to give up and fade away?: I guess I did that for awhile, sorta.

Who is your role model?: Don Draper. (j/k)

Can you touch your nose with your tongue?: If I had a knife.

Who in your family is the hardest to please?: Probably my SIL.

Do your parents support every decision that you make?: It took awhile, but I think they finally realized I wasn’t a complete fuckup. My brother helped reinforce that.

Is high school really as great as people say?: High school sucked. All three of them. But the one I graduated from made the news for something current students were doing on Facebook. Something about a bucket list……

Will you vote on election day?: Probably. Virginia has off-year state elections, so there’s one every November. My districts are so gerrymandered it doesn’t matter, but….

What religion do you practice?: I don’t. I want to believe, but…

How many times a week do you shower?: Seven, normally.

Does it matter what brand of clothing you wear?: Shoes, sometimes. Clothes, notsomuch.

Would you ever go on a reality show?: What are the chances I’d be asked to do something that’d make me barf?

What time do you wake up in the morning on a regular school/work day?: ~0530.

Do you like to order things from QVC?: Nope. They do have a call center close to my office. Or did. Dunno. The TV station where I worked was a “Shop at Home” affiliate. SAH, like the TV station, is a footnote in history now.

Do you have any online dating site profiles?: Maybe? I haven’t looked at any, really, since I started getting serious with my wife (almost five years ago now).

Would you rather never brush you hair again or never wear shoes again?: I’m a dude; at least I still have more hair than my younger brother.

Chicka, chicka, boom, boom; will there be enough room?: Venga Boys-Barenaked Ladies mashup?

Do you like candy or ice cream more?: Ice cream.

How long will you live at your current residence?: Just over three years.

Is taking high school/college classes online better than actual classes? No. I treat many online degrees with great suspicion. So, you can take out $100K in student loans, but can you write anything beyond your name?

Would you ever pierce your “private” areas?: I deal with needles enough, thankyouverymuch. My thigh is bad enough; not gonna stick it in my junk.

How much money do you have in your wallet or purse?: Nine dollars and 92 cents.

Do you think before you speak?: Yes.

Do you make the wrong choices often?: Shell game? yeah.

Do you have a busy weekend coming up?: This weekend, probably not. Next weekend, yes.

Does it make you mad when people stare at you?: I’m kind of oblivious these days.

How did you get your last bruise?: Dunno. Left knee. I guess I bumped something.

Have you ever fallen for someone older than you?: No.

What are you doing Thursday?: Working, or looking like it while answering a survey.

How are you feeling lately?: Lousy. I think I got her cold/flu/whatever.

Who is your last text message from?: My wife.

Do you feel awkward when strangers say hi to you?: Not normally.

Is anything upsetting you right now?: The DC weather forecast for next weekend.

Are you listening to music right now?: No.

Is it possible that you could be pregnant right now?: Um….

What are you thinking right now?: Does this survey just assume it’s a chick who’d take it?

Who was the last person you cried in front of?: My wife.

How many cell phones have you had in your life?: Seven?

What’s the last thing you laughed really hard over?: Dunno. Robot Chicken, maybe?

Is there anything in your past that you’d like to try again?: I dunno.

Did your parents spoil you as a child?: Maybe a little, but I think I ended up with less of a sense of entitlement than might be expected.

Will this weekend be a good one?: No idea. I hope so.

What are you excited about?: Leaving work.

Did you have a good birthday this year?: I haven’t had one this year. Last year’s is kind of a blur.

What color shirt are you wearing? I’m blue. dabadeedabeda

Do you have a reason to smile right now?: Not really.

Who was driving the last car you were in?: Moi.

What are you craving right now?: Motrin.

When was the last time you cried?: A few days ago.

Ever kissed someone who’s name starts with an a?: Nope. There was one in college I would have had I gotten the opportunity. Nay, make that two.

Is there one person who can make you feel better no matter what?: My wife.

Name the last four people you hugged?: My wife, my mom, my MIL,…and? I can’t remember the fourth.

What were you doing at 1:00 am?: Snoring.

Have you cried today?: Nope.

Whose bed did you sleep in last night?: Ours.

Are you currently frustrated with a girl/guy?: Nope. Enjoying wedded bliss.

Are you excited for winter?: It’s only here for a little while longer, so…no. Did I mention that the forecast lo for DC is -1F next Friday?

What’s your favorite season?: Late summer/early fall. Warm days, cool, less humid nights.

Are you stubborn?: I won’t answer this question, and you can’t make me! No, I’m not.

What were you doing at midnight last night?:

Have you told anybody you loved them today?: My wife.

Would you rather get up early or sleep in?: During the week? Early. Weekend? Late.

Who were you with on July 4, 2008?: My then-fiancee (now wife). If memory serves, she was really regretting her previous night’s experiment. (it involved cheap rum)

What was the first thing you thought about this morning?: Should I go back to sleep? (I woke up five minutes before my alarm.)

What do you do to relieve stress?: I don’t.

Do you wish upon stars?: I wished hard upon Lynda Carter when I was thirteen….

Would you go back and change any part of your life?: I don’t know; if there was a way to know what might have made me sick, maybe.

Do you believe love lasts forever?: I do.

Do you laugh enough? Probably not.


What is your opinion of sex?:  I like it.
Do you drink alcohol frequently?:  Not nearly as much as I used to.
How many of your friends are addicted to drugs?: I don’t know of any.
What is one genre of music that the world could do without?:  Why should this be my choice?  Listen to whatever you’d like.  If I don’t like it, I won’t listen.
Do you shave every inch of your body?:  I have enough trouble with my face.
Do you think that texting on a date is rude?:  Yes.
How many people have you kicked out of your life?:  Zero, though there are many people I don’t speak with anymore.
Do you enjoy the little things in life?:  Uh?
Are you a fast or slow learner?:  Depends upon how much I need to see to learn it.
Would you ever consider being a foster parent?:  No.
Do you still like the Disney Channel?:  Even more than in 2011, I couldn’t care less.
Are the J-Bros & Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus overrated?:  Ibid.
Where is one place that you’ve been that you’ll never go to again?:  I have no idea.  I will likely never have sex with anyone new again.  I’m okay with this.
Have you ever just wanted to give up and fade away?:  Give up on what?
Who is your role model?:  I don’t know that I have one.
Can you touch your nose with your tongue?:  *tries*  Nope.
Who in your family is the hardest to please?:  I have no idea why I said what I said years ago.  I really don’t know.
Do your parents support every decision that you make?:  No.  Remember the question about kicking people out of your life?  I will, and that would have included my parents.  I slink off without a word, and avoid contact.  That you’re a parent affects that some, but not completely.
Is high school really as great as people say?:   No.  High school sucked.  That I went to three of them increases that by 300%.  At the same time, I have so few memories of the second one, it almost feels like it didn’t even happen.
Will you vote on election day?:   Yes.  I live in one of those oft-covered “swing districts” now.  I like the incumbent, which means she’ll probably lose.  The party of the 49% voted in a white supremacist candidate to oppose perhaps the worst Senator in DC, so I’m SOL, there.  Timmay will win, but there is zero  reason to eve vote for him.  I did for both Lieutenant Governor and Governor.  This was after I met him, personally, at a legal event in probably 1999.  He was the worst governor in the history of the Commonwealth.  That might explain why Hillary selected him as her running mate.
What religion do you practice?:   I am a lapsed Catholic.
How many times a week do you shower?:  Six or seven.
Does it matter what brand of clothing you wear?:  No.
Would you ever go on a reality show?:  I really don’t watch much TV.  If I do, it’s stuff like Kennedy on Fox Business, or Vice News Tonight.
What time do you wake up in the morning on a regular school/work day?:  Normally sometime around six.  During the week, my wife is normally up at five to make her trip into the city for work.  She often kisses me when she leaves, and I normally go back to sleep.  On the weekends, I wake up to take my pill coctail.
Do you like to order things from QVC?:  No?
Do you have any online dating site profiles?:  Considering that I’ve been in a committed relationship for eighteen years now, no.
Would you rather never brush you hair again or never wear shoes again?:  I don’t often wear shoes as it is.
Chicka, chicka, boom, boom; will there be enough room?:  I still don’t know what the fuck this is about.
Do you like candy or ice cream more?:  Ice cream.
How long will you live at your current residence?:  I’ve only been here since May.  My wife’s been here since March.  We are staying with my brother and his wife until I get a full-time gig, and we find an acceptable place.  I have my fingers crossed for sometime early next year.
Is taking high school/college classes online better than actual classes?:  I think in-person interactions are important.  I did take several online classes as an undergrad, but all but a couple had on-campus meetings.  I think I normally learned more from the face-to-face sessions.  I think it also teaches you some interpersonal skills. So many people are afraid, now, to speak to anyone.
Would you ever pierce your “private” areas?:  No.
How much money do you have in your wallet or purse?:  I have a twenty, and a few singles.
Do you think before you speak?:  See the question about online classes.  Sure, I think most of the time, but there’s something to being able to carry on a conversation with someone, not necessarily to get a specific answer.
Do you make the wrong choices often?:  Yes, I’ve made some mistakes.
Do you have a busy weekend coming up?:  I really don’t know.  I hope I will get my infusion tomorrow, so I’m not miserable all weekend.
Does it make you mad when people stare at you?:   I really don’t notice that much.  One of the few perks of being half-blind.  But I’m sure people do stare;  what’s with the dude with the cane?
How did you get your last bruise?:  I don’t know.  I get bruises so often it’s impossible to track.
Have you ever fallen for someone older than you?:  Que?  Yes, I “fell” for my wife, not physically.
What are you doing Thursday?:  Well, I worked some this morning, even though I was out of billable hours.  This afternoon’s been all about trying to get medical shit straight.  Again.
How are you feeling lately?:  Bad.  I’m overdue for my infusion again.  I’m not going to elaborate, really.
Who is your last text message from?:  My wife.
Do you feel awkward when strangers say hi to you?:  No, not really.
Is anything upsetting you right now?:  That getting shit straight for my meds is so tough.
Are you listening to music right now?:  No, I’m listening to a podcast.
Is it possible that you could be pregnant right now?:  I’m even more sure about that than that I haven’t any kids.
What are you thinking right now?:   This was a long one.
Who was the last person you cried in front of?:  My wife.
How many cell phones have you had in your life?:  No idea.
What’s the last thing you laughed really hard over?:  Adam Corolla yesterday.  I think his news girl was doing an impov after being directed to go perform fellatio on a fictional guest.
Is there anything in your past that you’d like to try again?:  No.
Did your parents spoil you as a child?:  No.
Will this weekend be a good one?:  No idea.
What are you excited about?:  Football, maybe?
Did you have a good birthday this year?:  It hasn’t happened yet.
What color shirt are you wearing?:  It’s a lot whiter than I.
Do you have a reason to smile right now?:  No.
Who was driving the last car you were in?:  I haven’t driven since 2012;  no.
What are you craving right now?:  Nothing in particular.
When was the last time you cried?:  It’s been awhile.
Ever kissed someone who’s name starts with an a?:No.
Is there one person who can make you feel better no matter what?:  My wife can the vast majority of the time.
Name the last four people you hugged?:  The only people I remember hugging recently are my wife and my mother.
What were you doing at 1:00 am?: Sleeping.
Have you cried today?:   No.
Whose bed did you sleep in last night?:  The one my wife and I share right now.
Are you currently frustrated with a girl/guy?:  No.
Are you excited for winter?:  I really don’t care.
What’s your favorite season?:  Autumn.
Are you stubborn?:   No.
What were you doing at midnight last night?:
Have you told anybody you loved them today?:
Would you rather get up early or sleep in?:
Who were you with on July 4, 2008?:  Probably my then-fiancee, now-wife.
What was the first thing you thought about this morning?:  Pills, coffee.
What do you do to relieve stress?:  I don’t know.
Do you wish upon stars?:  No.
Would you go back and change any part of your life?:  I don’t know.  I’d probably drink less, and be more responsible with money.
Do you believe love lasts forever?:  Yes.
Do you laugh enough?  Probably not.

Twenty (8/8)

Do you think steps should be taken by government (local, state or federal) to help curb the obesity epidemic currently happening in the United States? If so, what steps should the government take? If not, how do you feel the problem of obesity can be addressed?

Like most things, I’m convinced there isn’t anything government can do to help.

In fact, I’ve heard repeated arguments lately that government actually caused this problem with their dietary guidelines.

Some will claim that those are there really at the behest of the grain industry.  Maybe.

No, actually not.  It’s not okay, but there’s nothing that can be done about it, now.  Locking Michelle Obama in a cage isn’t going to fix the overweight sixteen year-old that got fat eating those wonderful school lunches.

In so many instances, it is about calories consumed, primarily.

Newsflash:  portion control works.  I lost a lot of weight after my diagnosis by doing this:  1.  Eat good food.  2.  Accompany that good food with satisfying alcoholic beverages, and 3.  reducing my portion sizes.

Eat what you like.  Cut your portions in half.  If you’re still hungry after you eat the first helping, have seconds.  But cut those seconds in half, too.

I’m writing, because I intend to finish this all out.

At the same time, I’m not tweeting it (which also posts to FB).

Fuck it;  I’m done.  Between what’s happened in the past few days, and Lurch’s proposals for government fucking with the Intertubes, I’m done.

Much like Mrs. Clinton’s bit about requiring encryption backdoors, this is something that just won’t work.  Congress isn’t bright enough to understand that, but I guess if they wanna lock me in a cage, what can I do?

But my question, to many pols of both major parties, is simple:  How many people are you willing to put in prison to accomplish your goal?

Ultimately that’s what you do when you use government to accomplish your political goals.

Nineteen (8/7)

This floated in front of me earlier today, but it’s the same sort of information reported last week.

https://reason.com/blog/2018/07/31/democrats-tech-policy-plans-leaked

Discussions on and off on Facebook about Twitter shutting down accounts.

I also saw a story earlier today about how “Millennials” (I put that in quotes, because college students today probably aren’t Millennials;  how many of them remember Y2K?  They’re the kids of Gen X.  No, there weren’t many of us, but some have learned how babby is formed, and those would be the folks in college now….) on campus at Columbia couldn’t name the five freedoms guaranteed by the First Amendment.  Freedom of Speech was even one of the things they were having problems with.  When reminded about that, well, okay, so long as nobody is offended.  What.  The.  Actual.  Fuck?

But this was actually right around the bit about the ACLU deleted their tweet praising France’s law restricting free speech.

https://reason.com/blog/2018/08/03/aclu-catcalling-free-speech-tweet

Incredibly, the totes-not-evil company (the ones who were a number, and are now a bunch of letters) still has that tweet cached.

But I don’t want politicians deciding what I can read or say.   I would like to ask the people working for reconstitution of the Byrd Organization how many people they plan to throw in cages for reading shit they haven’t blessed.

But, hey, that might be treason, and good enough justification to execute me for treason.

Eighteen (8/8)

Work happened, and I think management is happy with this weekend’s slogs.

I’ve been going through the old posts to think back on that awful summer three years ago.  Maybe I shouldn’t harp on it, but I got a really shitty deal there.


Is there an aspect of your personality you wish you could chnage?

That’s a tough question. The only thing I can think of is that maybe I’m too trusting of ordinary people sometimes.

I don’t think my boss is out to get me.
I don’t think the government is out to get me.
I don’t think evil corporations are out to get me.

I’ve never attributed to malice what could more easily be explained by ignorance or stupidity.

“They’re not bad; they’re just stuid.”

Maybe that makes me a fool.

But, whatever. I could spend lots of spoons thinking about how I’ve been fucked over. But I don’t have enough to waste.



I think, maybe, this is still true.  At the same time, I’m comfortable with how I approach others, even if it means people sometimes take advantage.

All that said, I will break contact.  If you’ve done something that’s hurt me, I can basically write you out of my life.  I only have so many cycles.

What I’m not going to do is go out of my way to make things awful for you.

The news of the past couple of days is that Apple, Stitcher, et. al., have pulled Alex Jones off their platforms.

On my initial response, I was okay with this.  But after thinking more about it it, does that really serve any purpose, and what implication does it have for other things that aren’t your cup of tea.

Nope.  Keep it running.  Trumpet it.  If people don’t like it, they’ll be the editors.

Seventeen (8/5)

After writing yesterday’s bit, I realized that I hadn’t been reviewing my first summer of writing, in 2015.

My thoughts went there as I was thinking about why I”m doing this, and why I’m not getting the same sort of satisfaction from it as I did back then.

I’ve spent this weekend working.  Something north of ten hours yesterday, and about half that today.  Thanks to that, I may be finished roughly midday Thursday, which is more than okay, considering I have an infusion Thursday afternoon.  (And that is interesting, normally by this point, I’m absolutely exhausted.  I mean, I am, but I do feel a lot better than I would have the last few years….)

So, taking it back to 2015,

 

Write about your relationship status. How long has it been? Is it still good? If so, why?

I’ve been together with my wife for over nine years now.

We just work. And it really never feels like work. She’s the only person I’ve ever been with, where the experience is essentially effortless.

It’s a big freaky that I’ve been wiht her almost a third of her life, now, but…

At the same time, part of me asks, “why analyze this?” We love each other, are each other’s best friends, etc.. What’s to explain?

I do miss her every day I’m away for this shitty job, though.

That’s been as, if not more difficult than my medical maladies.

I feel better when I sleep in my own bed, next to her.

There’s really not a lot more to say about it than that.

Three years after writing that, I sleep next to her every night, and that’s a good thing.

Yes, we’re somewhere else.  Yes, we’re not on our own.

But we will be soon enough.

Last night, since we’ve got run of where we’re staying, after I finished working, we ended up just sitting and talking.

How many people can say that they can do that, really?  We do fit with each other, so it goes.  And I hope it does until I die.  I don’t want anybody else, and I can’t imagine being as comfortable with someone else.